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Friday, November 25, 2005 10:58:44 PM
By: argubot
25 Nov 2005, 10:48 PM EST
Msg. 20082 of 20083
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What I Would Do If I Was Evil
I would obtain a real estate license.
I would buy a piece of property with some potential. It doesn't have to be great.
I would buy a shell corporation and restructure the stock any way necessary to provide the company with BILLIONS of common shares.
I would exchange my asset, in this case a piece of property, for a ridiculous number of shares.
I would pay for a virtual office, so I could show a pretty picture of a building, from where my mail is forwarded, to where I sit at home in my underwear, "running" the company.
I would pay myself ridiculous numbers of common shares for just being CEO, CFO, COO, Secretary, Manager, and Janitor (of my virtual office).
I would dream up wonderful PRs about what I could do. Or, if I was to lazy, I'd give some creative BS artist a bunch of shares to do it for me.
I would begin dropping the PR bombs on the public.
I would begin, as the demand for the stock increases, through devices unknown to the public, begin slowly naked shorting my own stock. Not enough to completely fulfill demand, but just enough to keep it slowly rising.
I would then, after having put all those investor's money into my pocket by selling short, begin the other half of my diabolical plan, and start dumping all the common shares I personally owned, then I'd start in on selling the company's shares. Oh yes, I'm getting richer than I ever dreamed possible.
I would wait until there was no bid and put a giant block of shares for sale at .0001, effectively preventing any idiots dreaming of a rally from ever having a prayer of seeing .0002. Then I'd read the message boards and LMFAO whenever they said they were going to double their money on the next PR.
I would stop releasing PRs. I'd turn the telephone ringer off. I'd go vacation in the Caymans.
I would wait many, many months.
I would reverse split and release a PR saying I'm doing it to 'enhance shareholder value'. And I'd be LMFAO because I just reduced my short position by some ungodly percentage.
I would watch as everyone scrambled like rats off of a sinking ship to sell their stock and LMFAO as the price plummeted, because I'd be on the bid covering my short position, maybe. If I did bother to cover, I'd never keep the price up, I'd let it tick down and come to poppa.
I would sell the POS company to a holding company as a subsidiary, or as reverse-merger candidate.
I would buy a condo in Florida. I'd hang with other evil people.
I would have so much money I could cook up more scams than you could possibly imagine. Then I'd have even more money.
I would, most of all, LMFAO all day long.
Then I would die and fry in hell like the scum I am.
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