So folks, now you know what Canada thinks about the misuse of human beings.
> A Canadian female libertarian wrote a lot of letters to the Canadian
> government, complaining about the treatment of captive insurgents
> (terrorists) being held in Afghanistan National Correctional System
> facilities. She demanded a response to her letter correspondence.
> She received back the following reply:
> National Defense Headquarters
> M Gen George R. Pearkes Bldg., 15 NT
> 101 Colonel By Drive
> Ottawa , ON K1A 0K2
> Canada
> Dear Concerned Citizen,
> Thank you for your recent letter expressing your profound concern of
>
> treatment of the Taliban and Al Qaeda terrorists captured by
>
> Canadian Forces who were subsequently transferred to the Afghanistan
>
> Government and are currently being held by Afghan officials in
>
> Afghanistan National Correctional System facilities.
>
>
>
> Our administration takes these matters seriously and your opinions
>
> were heard loud and clear here in Ottawa . You will be pleased to
>
> learn, thanks to the concerns of citizens like yourself, we are
>
> creating a new department here at the Department of National Defense,
>
> to be called 'Liberals Accept Responsibility for Killers' program, or
>
> L.A.R.K. for short.
>
>
>
> In accordance with the guidelines of this new program, we have decided
>
> to divert one terrorist and place him in your personal care.
>
> Your personal detainee has been selected and is scheduled for
>
> transportation under heavily armed guard to your residence in Toronto
>
> next Monday.
>
>
>
> Ali Mohammed Ahmed bin Mahmud (you can just call him Ahmed) is to be
>
> cared for pursuant to the standards you personally demanded in
>
> your letter of complaint!
>
>
>
> It will likely be necessary for you to hire some assistant caretakers.
>
> We will conduct weekly inspections to ensure that your standards of
>
> care for Ahmed are commensurate with those you so strongly recommended
>
> in your letter. Although Ahmed is a sociopath and extremely violent,
>
> we hope that your sensitivity to what you described as his
>
> 'attitudinal problem' will help him overcome these character flaws.
>
> Perhaps you are correct in describing these problems as mere cultural
>
> differences.
>
>
> We understand that you plan to offer counseling and home
>
> schooling. Your adopted terrorist is extremely proficient in
>
> hand-to-hand combat and can extinguish human life with such simple items as a
>
> pencil or nail clippers. We advise that you do not ask him to
> demonstrate these skills at your
>
> next yoga group. Please advise any Jewish friends, neighbors or
>
> relatives about your house guest, as he might get agitated or even violent, but
>
> we are sure you can reason with him. He is also expert at making a
>
> wide variety of explosive devices from common household products, so
>
> you may wish to keep those items locked up, unless (in your opinion)
>
> this might offend him.
>
>
> Ahmed will not wish to interact with you or
>
> your daughters (except sexually) since he views females as a subhuman
>
> form of property thereby having no rights, including refusal of his
>
> sexual demands. This is a particularly sensitive subject for him and
> he has been known
>
> to show violent tendencies around women who fail to comply with the
>
> new dress code that he will "recommend" as more appropriate attire.
>
> I'm sure you will come to enjoy the anonymity offered by the burka
>
> over time. Just remember that it is all part of 'respecting his
>
> culture and religious beliefs' as described in your letter.
>
>
>
> Thanks again for your concern.
>
> We truly appreciate it when folks like you keep us informed of the
>
> proper way to do our job and care for our fellow man.
>
> You take good care of Ahmed and remember we'll be watching.
>
>
>
> Good luck and God bless you.
>
> Cordially,
>
>
>
> Gordon O'Connor
>
> Minister of National Defense
