Vex....
You'll have to be the one to make the coffee and while it's brewing, quietly go up the stairs to the last room down the left hallway. Speak softly to the maiden of the house, "SCARLETT, GET YOUR DUFF DOWN HERE AND MAKE SOME BISCUITS AND GRAVY, AND WHILE YOU'RE AT IT, SCRAMBLE SOME EGGS, TOO!"....
Of course, Larry and I will be hiding in the barn.... :)