DNAprint Genomics (DNAG)

[stakddek]

"$260 ancestrybydna test ordered by Maudie Fricker"

Beautiful Downtown Burbank was a buzz today with word of mouth about recent swabbings in the neighborhood. It has been reported that Maudie Fricker (neigh Frickert) has followed the lead of her neighbors and to to insure the maternity of her son Jonathan she has opted to use DNA Maternity testing.

Maudie heard about the test through a recent FFOF Award given to the Farkle Family. Fanny Farkle her neighbor had recieved the award last week after her husband of many years Frank and many other male neighbors had been swept up in a police DNA dragnet. The recent spate of malicious defecations upon the green lawns of Beautiful Downtown Burbank spurred the investigation.

An obvious error in the collection process led to the results creating some acrimony amongst the neighbors until the misadressed results were provided to the correct recepients. Only a stable family like that of Fanny and Fred could be counted on to see the plain as the nose on your face error in the mismarking of the results for delivery. Franks had been inadvertently delivered to his neighbor, our local milkman.

Recent scoopings from lawns about beautiful downtown Burbank would seem to indicate that all the hubbub was the result of the misidentification of deer droppings. This is a further indictment of our municipal fathers and the slovenlieness of our neighborhoods as they continue to ignore the blight of walnetto shells strewn about our lawns and parks. Someone should smack them with a purse.

Stakddek