Just because I don't care for Lindros...
Re-made in Manhattan
January 7, 2003
Sometimes, it’s hard to tell whether a team is just plain atrocious, or whether there are other factors to consider.
The New York Rangers pose no such dilemma.
Saying the Rangers are a disappointment is like saying Sierra Leone isn’t a tourist haven: sure, it’s true, but such a simple categorization does the severity of the situation a disservice.
Let’s be clear: the Rangers are beyond bad. Imagine a triple-bill concert featuring Roxette, Yoko Ono and The Captain & Tennille. Imagine a Tom Green retrospective at the local cinema. Imagine being Whitney Houston’s publicist. Imagine Dr. Phil coming to live with you for a few years. The Rangers make all those things seem like discovering Bill Gates libeled you in print.
With a Gatesian payroll hovering around $70 million (tops in the league), the Rangers seemed like a playoff shoo-in at the start of the campaign. But with half-a-season to go, the playoffs are little more than a pipe dream for GM Glen Sather and Co. And if things don’t change soon, somebody at Madison Square Garden is going to wind up getting de-hired.
A quick summary: The Rangers are 15-21-6-1. The Rangers have allowed 33 more goals than they’ve scored, second-worst in the NHL. The Rangers recently signed Billy Tibbetts, adding to a lineup that, in one season, has featured the following players, none of whom could reasonably be referred to as ‘softies’: Krysztof Oliwa, Matthew Barnaby, Gordie Dwyer, Ronald Petrovicky, Dale Purinton and Sandy McCarthy. (What exactly is the explanation for this, anyway? Was there a run on tinfoil?) And the Rangers are rumored to have interest in Jiri Dopita. Yes. Jiri Dopita.
In short, the Rangers are a mess.
“But Sather won some Stanley Cups a while back!” you say. “Surely Screen Shots is not suggesting he might not be the person to lead them out of this? Well?”
Well, as a matter of fact, that’s exactly what we’re suggesting.
What else should anyone expect? Should Bryan Trottier take the fall? We’re not arguing the coach isn’t partially responsible, but he’d be the second Rangers coach to lose his job under Sather’s regime, now middling along aimlessly in its 3rd year. Number of Ranger playoff appearances under Sather? Zilch. Number of consecutive years without a post-season game? Five, tying the franchise’s record for futility.
General managers can only pin their troubles on coaches so many times before ownership steps in, and without a stunning turnaround, Sather will be held accountable sooner than later. What, then, should the plan of action be?
Simple: rebuild from scratch. Stop laughing.
Trade Eric Lindros. Trade Pavel Bure. Trade Bobby Holik. Trade Peter Nedved. Trade Darius Kasparaitis. Get back as many young, talented, hungry players as possible, no matter how little they’re known in the five boroughs. Keep Mark Messier around in some capacity to show the youngsters what winning is all about.
We said, stop laughing.
Yes, we know New York City likes its stars. We know the thought of movie stars and captains of industry paying big bucks to see no-name pluggers seems far-fetched. But, having resided in Manhattan for the better part of a year, we feel like an honorary New Yorker. More importantly, we know how hard it is to be a hockey fan in New York.
To wit: In 1994, we went to a sports bar with the intention of watching the Toronto Maple Leafs play the Vancouver Canucks in the Western Conference semifinal. The NBA’s Knicks were also playing that night. Out of 40 TV sets, we couldn’t persuade the bartender to change even one of the channels. Bribes were rejected. Daggers were stared. Bills were paid, and exits were made. Not a fun night.
The point is, you have to work to be a hockey fan in New York City. There are thousands of other ways to spend your money there. Fans who fill the Garden night after night do so because they love the game.
If those fans were presented with a fast-skating, exciting young group of players, guys who had the chance to grow as a unit and develop into something special, we think they’d welcome the change. At least there would be a semblance of a blueprint, rather than a slapdash, patchwork attempt to stuff a marquee at the expense of winning, as is the case now.
When you think about it, there has never been a better time for the Rangers to rebuild. In spite of poor teamwork, individual slumps and injury problems, the aforementioned stars would still fetch a healthy crop of prospects.
And let’s face it: New York doesn’t simply house stars. It creates stars. You’re trying to say a team like the Vancouver Canucks, a Western Conference powerhouse – and product of a long and tortured rebuild – wouldn’t be neck-and-neck with the NFL’s Giants and Jets for airtime on local sports radio? You’re saying that Todd Bertuzzi, the Canucks’ epitome of grizzle, wouldn’t be as popular as Mark Messier ever was? You’re saying that Ed Jovanovski, one of the league’s top defensive talents, wouldn’t have Garden fans eating out of the palm of his hands after a thundering check?
We’re saying you’re nuts. New York doesn’t need another big-ticket addition to a club going nowhere fast. All New York needs is a plan.
Preferably, one that doesn’t include Kevin Sawyer.
AI
