I need a place for a rant. This seems as good a place as any. Ever been under a lot of pressure @ work? Deadlines? Working goofy hours? Ok Wayne, not you but other peeps like Susie let's say. So you go into work @ like 5:00 AM. You are getting a lot done cause no phones ringing, no nasty emails when...BOOM...technology smacks you upside the head. Let's take the photocopier. Used to be a simple enough machine...right? Stick an original in, push a button and voila!...a reproduction of what you stuck in. Ever seen these new fangled ones? I think ours makes coffee AND will add a sugar substitute. We got this Canon somethingorother. So I'm in here at the crack of crowpiss, doing all sorts of shit. Copying, shredding, blah blah blah. Send (yeah, send) something to the copier for printing (printing? since when was it changed from copying to printing but I digress as this rant) when it decides that not only won't it make any more coffee...it won't print. Red error light is flashing. WHAAAAAT? You can't flash...I'm here all alone, a veritable Luddite when it comes to anything more complicated that removing a cover from a pen, and YOU decide not to fucking copy/print????? So I get up off my ass and very cautiously look at the screen to see WTF is going on - hope it just needs paper cause that I've figured out. And it says...
"Remove full waste toner bottle below & replace with new one".
WTF??? This thing has a garbage can in it? Don't the cleaners deal with that every night? WTF??? Who can I call? I know - I'll call Canon. Wrong - they closed @ 7:00 last night & will reopen Monday AM. Thanks for fucking nothing. Ok, which of the secretaries are gonna be up @ 6:00 AM Saturday? Answer...none. Calm thyself I say. K...gonna follow the instructions on the screen. Opening this, unhooking that. Everything is motoring along until it says remove old bottle & replace with new one? WTF? Can't I just empty the toner bottle & replace it with the same one? What a scam... Where the fuck am I gonna get a new toner bottle at this hour. Then I decide to start hunting around the office....and voila (that's two voilas for those counting)! After about 30 minutes of hunting & in the least likely place of all ie right beside the copier is a box with a "new waste bottle" written on it. I thought I was gonna come right there. Out with the old, in with the new, deposit the old on secretary's desk to get a new one & I'm back in business.
See ya!
Sic friatur crustum dulce
