Ok, CM, you forced me into it ...
Having been gifted with a certain glibness, I once, years ago, near a lake in Bloomington, Illinois, decided to intercede on behalf of a charming young thing who was being assaulted by a drunken paratrooper (I was Air Force, myself). I caught his attention, and attempted to defuse that nasty situation with calm words in a soothing tone.
He beat the livin' shit out of me.
Fred