Here's a email that I got that defines "liberal" pretty good!!
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF JOE REPUBLICAN
Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with water to prepare his
morning coffee. The water is clean and good because some
tree-hugging liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards. With his
first swallow of coffee, he takes his daily medication. His
medications are safe to take because some stupid commie liberal fought to
insure their safety and that they work as advertised.
All but $10 of his medications are paid for by his employer's medical plan
because some liberal union workers fought their
employers for paid medical insurance - now Joe gets it too. He prepares his
morning breakfast, bacon and eggs. Joe's bacon is
safe to eat because some girly-man liberal fought for laws to regulate the
meat packing industry.
In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo. His bottle is properly
labeled with each ingredient and its amount in the total
contents because some crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what he
was putting on his body and how much it contained.
Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a deep breath. The air he breathes is
clean because some environmentalist wacko liberal fought
for laws to stop industries from polluting our air. He walks to the subway
station for his government-subsidized ride to work. It saves
him considerable money in parking and transportation fees because some
fancy-pants liberal fought for affordable public
transportation, which gives everyone the opportunity to be a contributor.
Joe begins his work day. He has a good job with excellent pay, medical
benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation because
some lazy liberal union members fought and died for these working standards.
Joe's employer pays these standards because Joe's
employer doesn't want his employees to call the union. If Joe is hurt on the
job or becomes unemployed, he'll get a worker
compensation or unemployment check because some stupid liberal didn't think
he should lose his home because of his temporary
misfortune.
Its noontime and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so he can pay some bills.
Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FSLIC because some
godless liberal wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous bankers who
ruined the banking system before the Great Depression.
Joe has to pay his Fannie Mae-underwritten mortgage and his below-market
federal student loan because some elitist liberal
decided that Joe and the government would be better off if he was educated
and earned more money over his lifetime.
Joe is home from work. He plans to visit his father this evening at his farm
home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive. His
car is among the safest in the world because some America-hating liberal
fought for car safety standards. He arrives at his boyhood
home. His was the third generation to live in the house financed by Farmers'
Home Administration because bankers didn't want to make
rural loans. The house didn't have electricity until some big-government
liberal stuck his nose where it didn't belong and
demanded rural electrification.
He is happy to see his father, who is now retired. His father lives on Social
Security and a union pension because some wine-drinking,
cheese-eating liberal made sure he could take care of himself so Joe wouldn't
have to.
Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns on a radio talk show.
The radio host keeps saying that liberals are bad and
conservatives are good. He doesn't mention that the beloved Republicans have
fought against every protection and benefit Joe
enjoys throughout his day.
Joe agrees: "We don't need those big-government liberals ruining our lives!
After all, I'm a self-made man who believes everyone should
take care of themselves, just like I have."
