> > > YES, I'M A BAD AMERICAN
> > >
> > > by George Carlin
> > >
> > >
> > > I Am Your Worst Nightmare. I am a BAD American. I am George Carlin.
> > >
> > > I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some mid
> level
> > governmental functionary be it Democratic or Republican!
> > >
> > > I'm in touch with my feelings and I like it that way, damn it!
> > >
> > > I think owning a gun doesn't make you a killer, it makes you a smart
> > American.
> > >
> > > I think being a minority does not make you noble or victimized, and
does
> > not entitle you to anything.
> > >
> > > I believe that if you are selling me a Big Mac, try to do it in
English.
> > >
> > > I think fireworks should be legal on the 4th of July.
> > >
> > > I think that being a student doesn't give you any more enlightenment
> than
> > working at Blockbuster. In fact, if your parents are footing the bill to
> put
> > your pansy ass through 4 years plus, of college, you haven't begun to be
> > enlightened.
> > >
> > > I believe everyone has a right to pray to his or her God when and
where
> > they want to.
> > >
> > > My heroes are John Wayne, Babe Ruth, Roy Rogers, and whoever canceled
> > Jerry Springer.
> > >
> > > I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor.
> > >
> > > I know wrestling is fake and I don't waste my time arguing about it.
> > >
> > > I think global warming is a big lie. Where are all those experts now,
> when
> > I'm freezing my ass off during these long winters and paying, paying,
> > paying?
> > >
> > > I've never owned a slave, or was a slave, I didn't wander forty years
In
> > the desert after getting chased out of Egypt. I haven't burned any
witches
> > or been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you! So,
shut-the-Hell-up
> > already.
> > >
> > > I want to know which church is it exactly where the Reverend Jesse
> Jackson
> > practices, where he gets his money, and why he is always part of the
> problem
> > and not the solution. Can I get an AMEN on that one?
> > >
> > > I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry ass if you're
> > running from them.
> > >
> > > I also think they have the right to pull your ass over if you're
> breaking
> > the law, regardless of what color you are.
> > >
> > > I think if you are too stupid to know how a ballot works, I don't want
> you
> > deciding who should be running the most powerful nation in the world for
> the
> > next four years.
> > >
> > > I dislike those people standing in the intersections trying to sell me
> > crap or trying to guilt me into making "donations" to their cause. These
> > people should be targets.
> > >
> > > I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes
two
> > parents.
> > >
> > > I believe if she has her lips on your Willie, it's sex, and this
applies
> > even if you are President of the United States.
> > >
> > > And what the hell is going on with gas prices... again?
> > >
> > > If this makes me a BAD American, then yes, I'm a BAD American.
> > >
> > > If you are a BAD American too, please forward this to everyone you
know.
> > >
> > > We need our country back!
> >
