OK--22.67% (going into this week) huh?
No problem.
Here's my plan:
DPDW - fights the month-end downward draft and announces a deal to provide all sub-sea vehicles to XOM in the Gulf for a period of 3 years. Stock struggles through early selling to close up 27%
EGMI - Harrah's announces a single-source deal for EGMI to deliver in-room electronic game cards. Stock rises 25% and change.
DIGF - someone notices that it exists, and also happens to be paranoid about being hit between the eyes with a missile, which does not explode (but that does not help you much if it hits you between the eyes!). This guy digs deep into the cushions on his couch, comes up with a couple hundred bucks (look--if you are worried about whether the Niners cover tonight, you find quarters in your cushions. Guys who worry about missiles hitting them between the eyes, however, are top-shelf, finding a couple long-forgotten saw-bucks is not that unlikely. Trust me on this one. I have been assured it is true) and chases DIGF all the way up to a $2 close. About 25%--book it, Dano.
PTSC - Following up on Wednesday's announcement of a mega-deal with LEGO, on Friday, PTSC will announce a massive licensing agreement with...McDonald's. Turns out Mickie-D's has been embedding microchips in every burger--billions and billions sold. They have been selling the tracking data to Google, so GOOG is a co-defendant. Ronald McDonald is scheduled to testify in Texas just after the Hamburgler. TPL, with typical understatement, announces that this is just the beginning of patent actions in the restaurant vertical, thanks Mickie-Ds for their endorsement of the patent portfolio and announces that subsequent licensees in that vertical won't get discounts. Stock advances 30%! In a throw-away line at the bottom of the PR, Mickie-D's announces a new strategic sourcing agreement that will significantly reduce the cost of their burgers (no price decrease foreseen). MCD investors are excited, and start digging on the internet to try to identify the mystery partner, but PTSC investors yawn and really don't care. Another day, another dollar, another licensee. PTSC holders drank the Kool-Aid long ago.
ICTL - After months of hush-hush market testing, ICTL takes out 24 solid hours on the Shopping Network, with cross-promotion luring housewives fed up with ESPN's college football marathon. They wow 'em with a slick new infomercial that shows everyone that Derma-Wand can remove the wrinkles that appear in your husband's tummy after he watches college football for 14 straight hours. Men and women across the nation rejoice, uncounted marriages are saved, Derma-Wand sets all-time sales records and ICTL races forward, up 40% intraday and settling to an acceptable +28%.
GRGR - Now it is up to GRGR, despite the brutal spread. GRGR investors are worn out, and dare not hope. They are Waiting For Godot. He either will come, or he won't. What sparse message board traffic there is relates largely to the meaning of life, whether a leaf really makes a sound when it falls and no one is there to hear it, and whether to get 'roni and 'rooms or Hawaiian on tonight's pizza. An anxious nsom looks on--we need a miracle here. A close on the bid is a 15% hit! We need a gain, but deep in his heart nsom knows that GRGR will be hard-pressed to close unchanged on the ask on the last day of the month. Returning to his screen after lunch ('roni and 'rooms), nsom realizes that, given the way his other PSL6 stocks have jumped (see above), and the fact that GRGR, having depreciated from its PSL6 starting value while a couple others went up, does not represent an equal share of the portfolio, maybe even a close on the ask will do it! Nsom readies a 100 share buy order at .20. Then, at 2:38 EDT, the news hits! GRGR comes out with a totally unexpected press release, announcing a major new market for their wood chips! A whole new distribution channel that might be expanded worldwide, involving a close partnership and sole-supply agreement with a MAJOR Fortune 500 company--a top-tier household name! Message board posters scramble into action, and eventually an awkwardly parsed Google search reveals...that GRGR will be supplying wood ships to McDonalds! As much as they can send, for the next 10 years! GRGR rallies to .30, a 50% gain, and nsom quietly cancels his 100 share order (and enters a sell all instead). Despite the relative obscurity of GRGR, it somehow rallies to close up 19.8726345245%, Cross-over buying from MCD shareholders is credited for the move.
SSK spends 3 days refining his spreadsheets, and nsom is declared THE WINNER!
It could happen!
