Up on the housetop, Wierwolves of Phoenix.
Just as I was reaching a decent state of REMs this AM I began to incorporate sounds into my dream. There seemed to be a persistant clunking sound comming from the other end of the house, which I percieved, in my dream, as the delivery guys arriving early to deliver soulmates Christmas present, Sean Connery, on Viagra with a beg red ribbon tied around his principal appendage. Then a noise akin to the sounds "The Hounds Of Hell" might make, overwhelmed sureality and I sat straight up in bed knowing there is only one creature that makes these noises, "Crock Doggie". Well, by the time I got my robe on and clicked the safety off my home protection device, while proceeding to the sliding glass door in the AZ. room, I barely caught a glimpse of this black clad figure, clumsily falling over the 8 ft. fence in my back yard with old "Crock Doggie" right dead in his ass. Upon further investigation, I found a pair of cheap wrap around sunglasses, maybe thats why the perp didn't see the beware of dog sign. There is a time to be cool and a time to be smart, anyway my point is that Dogs can be an excellent deterent against those who would dare to invade your home. Thank Someones God I didn't have to shoot the silly sumbitch. I didn't bother to call 911 as my neighbor is a heavy sleeper and has too much stuff for one person anyway.
This story has been ever so slightly embellished to enhance the pleasure of the reading public.
