Weird, Funny News & Jokes

[Telephonics]

In Honor of Stupid People . . . .

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through
stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
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On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(That's the only time I have to work on my hair.)
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On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details
inside.
(the shoplifter special?)
_____

On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be???....)
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On some Swanson frozen dinners --

"Serving Suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's just a suggestion.)
_____

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) --

"Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)
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On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding --

"Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)
_____

On packaging for a Rowenta iron --

"Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me time?)
_____

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate
machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could
just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)
___

On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(...I'm taking this because???....)
_____

On most brands of Christmas lights --

"For indoor or outdoor use only."

(as opposed to what?)
_____

On a Japanese food processor --

"Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

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On Sainsbury's peanuts --

"Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)
_____

On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat
nuts."

Step 3: say what?)
_____

On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable
you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
____

On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or
genitals."

(Oh my gosh..was there a lot of this happening some where?)
_____

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity
and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even
chuckle)...





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