Katanga Mining Limited (KAT)

[Dr_Vonschellan]

Ring Ring
Hijacker Spokesperson Switchboard: Hello, this is DRC Hijacker's Emporium the main headquarters... please follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. What can I do for you?
Joey: Let me talk to the agent code-named Dan.
Hijacker Spokesperson Switchboard: Hold for a moment please while I connect you to our observer ship in the Straits of Gibraltar.
Hijacker Spokesperson: Hello?
Joey: This is Joey.
Hijacker Spokesperson: ... and what did you f*ck up now?
Joey: Well errrr I might have sold some Chinese refined cobalt originally mined willy-nilly by some half-starved DRC little kids to a Russian battery maker who made some top-secret batteries for the Russian navy submarine corps handling dirty-ops.
Hijacker Spokesperson: ... and?
Joey: ... and the Chinese chemistry on the cobalt wasn't up to snuff... plus it was radioactive.
Hijacker Spokesperson: ... and?
Joey: I need you to call the Kremlin and tell Vladimir that it was the Chinese that f*cked-up... not me. And that I will never send Chinese cobalt to Russia again if he will cancel the "contract" to cut my balls off and stuff them down my throat to choke me to death.
Hijacker Spokesperson: Joey, Joey, Joey... this one is going to cost you a $10,000,000 USA wire transfer now.
Joey: I'll do it. When can you straighten this out?
Hijacker Spokesperson: I will have a 3-4 hour window right after Iran hijacks a British oil freighter in the Persian Gulf any time soon now.
Joey: Please don't delay.
Hijacker Spokesperson: You need to realize you can't send that Chinese cobalt to Russia... they don't play 'dat shit.
Joey: I know, I know... it will never happen again.

Click..............bzzzzzzz