Kraig Biocraft Laboratories Inc (KBLB)

[es1]

when there’s never been one shred of evidence that technical analysis is better than bottle spinning.

Have to disagree M4N.
There is a book called "candlestick charting explained" by Gregory Morris.
They ran every trade on every stock over a 10 year period and used the data to see the accuracy of chart patterns and "reading the tea leaves" can increase your wins by over 50% over typical fundamental analysis.

Not all chart patterns are equal but there are a few you can rely on almost 100%.