Katanga Mining Limited (KAT)

[Dr_Vonschellan]

Ring Ring (calling Addis Ababa)
Hijacker Spokesperson: Hello, this is DRC Hijacker's Emporium the main headquarters... please follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. What can I do for you?
Joey: Let me talk to the agent code-named Dan.
Hijacker Spokesperson: Hold for a moment please whilst I patch you through to Addis Ababa Ethiopia.
Ring Ring
Hijacker Spokesperson: Hello.
Joey: What the hell is going on there in Addis Ababa?
Hijacker Spokesperson: Well, your hand-carved cobalt voodoo/porn dolls are a huge hit. Everyone wants one and they will pay big bucks for one.
Joey: How much can you get?
Hijacker Spokesperson: At least $500 a pop if they are the porno version made smooth and shiny... the dull luster voodoo ones aren't as popular.
Joey: I will have a another 1,000 made for you.
Hijacker Spokesperson: Great.
Joey: What else?
Hijacker Spokesperson: Well things don't look good for the Joey-Felix ticket at all. All the SADC member states are super pissed off that all these Congolese refugees are leaving the DRC, spilling over the borders into their neighboring countries decimating their meager welfare budgets, carrying Ebola, bringing more 4F-ing (ie Fighting, Fussing. F**king & Fixing Flats), overloading their already-struggling schools, and bringing all the "moocher" parasitic rebels from the DRC plus the guns into their peaceful countries.
Joey: What are they going to do on Thursday?
Hijacker Spokesperson: I am almost certain they will follow the Lima Group playbook used to isolate/de-legitimize Nicholas Maduro so perfectly

Joey: Can they do that?
Hijacker Spokesperson: Of course they can, especially if the USA declares Mr Joey-Felix a Persona non grata like they will surely do to Nicholas Maduro https://www.mcclatchydc.com/news/nation-world/world/latin-america/article224566420.html any day now.
Joey: This is horrible for me.
Hijacker Spokesperson: You betcha'.
Joey: Did the Netflix people contact you about doing a made-for-TV movie on the last 4 weeks in the DRC?
Hijacker Spokesperson: Yup.
Joey: Are you going to act in it?
Hijacker Spokesperson: Yes, I am going to be King Leopold in the flashbacks.
b]Joey: Really! Who is going to play your part?
Hijacker Spokesperson: Either Larry David from Seinfeld or Senator Bernie Sanders.
Joey: They want me to play the Martin Fayulu role.
Hijacker Spokesperson: I would take the Martin Fayulu gig if I were you... you don't want to play the Your Highness Joey part I can guarantee you.

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