A little light humour at the expense of us Brits!!
Christine x
Proud to be British ??
>
>
>
> One of the British national daily newspapers is asking readers "what
>it
>
> means to be British?" Some of the emails are hilarious but this is
>one from
>
> a chap in Switzerland...
>
>
>
> Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a
>
> Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a
>Turkish
>
> kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American TV
>shows
>
> on a Japanese TV.
>
> And the most British thing of all?
>
> Suspicion of anything foreign.
>
>
>
> Oh and
>
>
>
> Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than an
>ambulance.
>
>
>
> Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way
>to the
>
> back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can
>buy
>
> cigarettes at the front.
>
>
>
> Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large
>fries, and a
>
> DIET coke.
>
>
>
> Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens
>to the
>
> counters.
>
>
>
> Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the
>drive
>
> and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
>
>
>
> Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and
>then
>
> have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't
>want to
>
> talk to in the first place.
>
>
>
> Only in Britain... are there disabled parking places in front of a
>skating
>
> rink.
>
>
>
> NOT TO MENTION...
>
> 3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
>
> 142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new
>shirts.
>
> 58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of
>
> screwdrivers.
>
> 31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while
>the
>
> fairy lights were plugged in.
>
> 19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas
>decorations
>
> were chocolate.
>
> British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker
>pulling
>
> accidents.
>
> 101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled
>out of
>
> the soles of their feet.
>
> 18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit
>
> cigarette in their mouth.
>
> A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after
>
> opening bottles of beer with their teeth.
>
> 5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of Control
>
> Scalextric cars.
>
> and finally.........
>
> In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the
>toilet.
>
>
>
> Proud to be British???
