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Posts | 51 |
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Alias Born | 01/22/2018 |
Wednesday, February 21, 2018 5:42:42 PM
The name's MazelTov, Adolf Mazeltov. And I come before you good people tonight with an idea. Probably the greatest—Aw, it's not for you. It's more a Petrone Worldwide idea.
No! Tell us the idea! <screeeetch>
All right. I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll show you my idea. I give you the ASTI....thing!
I've sold ASTI to Brockway, Ogdenville, and North Haverbrook, and, by gum, it put them on the map!
Well, sir, there's nothin' on Earth like a genuine bona-fide electrified six one-thousandths of one cent! What'd I say?
ASTI thing!
What's it called?
ASTI thing.
That's right!
ASTI thing!
ASTI...ASTI...ASTI...
I hear those things are awfully shitty.
I'll give you unrelated links and call them pretty!
Is there a chance the ASTI could go kaput?
Not on your life, I'd bet my autistic foot!
What about us brain-dead slobs?
ASTI is perfect while you touch your knobs.
Were you sent here by the devil?
No, good sir, I read on a fourth-grade level.
The ring came off my pudding can.
Take my mom's meth pipe, you air quotes "man".
I swear, it's you white trash's only choice!
Throw up your hands and raise your voice!
ASTI...
What's it called?
ASTI...
Once again!
ASTI!
But my face is still all cracked and broken.
Sorry pizza delivery driver, the mob has spoken!
ASTI....
ASTI!!!!!
ASTI!!!!!!!!!!
AS—D'oh!
Recent ASTI News
- Ascent Solar Technologies Announces Debt Pay Off for Outstanding Balances • GlobeNewswire Inc. • 06/21/2024 12:00:00 PM
- Form 8-K - Current report • Edgar (US Regulatory) • 06/14/2024 08:30:10 PM
- Form 4 - Statement of changes in beneficial ownership of securities • Edgar (US Regulatory) • 06/12/2024 09:53:56 PM
- Form 4 - Statement of changes in beneficial ownership of securities • Edgar (US Regulatory) • 06/11/2024 11:52:53 PM
- Form 4 - Statement of changes in beneficial ownership of securities • Edgar (US Regulatory) • 06/11/2024 11:51:04 PM
- Form 4 - Statement of changes in beneficial ownership of securities • Edgar (US Regulatory) • 06/11/2024 11:49:56 PM
- Form PRE 14A - Other preliminary proxy statements • Edgar (US Regulatory) • 06/06/2024 08:35:04 PM
- Form 8-K - Current report • Edgar (US Regulatory) • 05/30/2024 12:05:09 PM
- Form 424B5 - Prospectus [Rule 424(b)(5)] • Edgar (US Regulatory) • 05/30/2024 12:00:29 PM
- Form 8-K - Current report • Edgar (US Regulatory) • 05/23/2024 09:27:23 PM
- Form 424B5 - Prospectus [Rule 424(b)(5)] • Edgar (US Regulatory) • 05/23/2024 09:26:14 PM
- Form 8-K - Current report • Edgar (US Regulatory) • 05/16/2024 08:45:14 PM
- Form 424B5 - Prospectus [Rule 424(b)(5)] • Edgar (US Regulatory) • 05/16/2024 08:40:50 PM
- Ascent Solar Collaborates with University of Stuttgart IGTE for the Development and Distribution of Sustainable Power Generation Technology • GlobeNewswire Inc. • 05/16/2024 12:30:00 PM
- Ascent Solar Technologies Receives Firm Order of Thin-Film PV from Mega-Constellation Satellite Manufacturer to Power Next Generation Hardware • GlobeNewswire Inc. • 05/14/2024 12:55:00 PM
- Form 10-Q - Quarterly report [Sections 13 or 15(d)] • Edgar (US Regulatory) • 05/09/2024 08:10:49 PM
- Ascent Solar Technologies, Inc. Announces Second and Third Closings of Public Offering of Common Stock and Pre-Funded Warrants at $0.14 Per Share • GlobeNewswire Inc. • 04/18/2024 09:11:53 PM
- Momentus and Ascent Solar Technologies Partner to Bring to Market Leading-Edge Solar Arrays • Business Wire • 04/17/2024 02:00:00 PM
- Momentus and Ascent Solar Technologies Partner to Bring Leading-Edge Solar Arrays to Market • GlobeNewswire Inc. • 04/17/2024 02:00:00 PM
- Ascent Solar Technologies, Inc. Announces Initial Closing of Public Offering of Common Stock and Pre-Funded Warrants • GlobeNewswire Inc. • 04/12/2024 09:00:00 PM
- Ascent Solar Technologies, Inc. Announces Pricing of $6,000,000 Public Offering of Shares of Common Stock • GlobeNewswire Inc. • 04/10/2024 12:48:54 PM
- Ascent Solar Technologies Achieves CIGS Technology Power Generation Milestones at Production Scale with Thin Film • GlobeNewswire Inc. • 03/25/2024 02:30:00 PM
- Ascent Solar Technologies Announces Substantial Debt Reduction and Plan for Full Payoff • GlobeNewswire Inc. • 03/21/2024 01:25:00 PM
- Ascent Solar Technologies Announces Warrants Repurchase Agreements • GlobeNewswire Inc. • 03/14/2024 01:25:00 PM
- Form 8-K - Current report • Edgar (US Regulatory) • 03/11/2024 09:15:11 PM
Cannabix Technologies and Omega Laboratories Inc. Provide Positive Developments on Marijuana Breathalyzer Testing • BLO • Jul 11, 2024 8:21 AM
ECGI Holdings Enhances Board with Artificial Intelligence (AI) Expert Ahead of Allon Apparel Launch • ECGI • Jul 10, 2024 8:30 AM
Avant Technologies to Meet Unmet Needs in AI Industry While Addressing Sustainability Concerns • AVAI • Jul 10, 2024 8:00 AM
Panther Minerals Inc. Launches Investor Connect AI Chatbot for Enhanced Investor Engagement and Lead Generation • PURR • Jul 9, 2024 9:00 AM
Glidelogic Corp. Becomes TikTok Shop Partner, Opening a New Chapter in E-commerce Services • GDLG • Jul 5, 2024 7:09 AM
Freedom Holdings Corporate Update; Announces Management Has Signed Letter of Intent • FHLD • Jul 3, 2024 9:00 AM