My Front Porch

[MiamiGent]

What proceedure(s)? Vaneers? implants (in the jaw!), braces, bonding,

[Stock_Barber]

I must be getting old... my first thought was... "Those teeth set their dads back a bundle!

[MiamiGent]

No, I promote self-reliance.

[MiamiGent]

No. My hands are in my pockets.

[jhnvtjll]

Are you buying for her?

[jhnvtjll]

Are you shopping for a special someone?

[MiamiGent]

Macy is running a sale on beach attire. Summer can't be far away!

https://www.macys.com/shop/product/bar-iii-tie-dye-for-printed-bandeau-bikini-top-created-for-macys?ID=13169603&tdp=cm_app~zMCOM-NAVAPP~xcm_zone~zPDP_ZONE_A~xcm_choiceId~zcidM05MVV-11c82d33-fbaf-4a91-b5d1-02c55100c970%40HB2%40Customers%2Balso%2Bshopped%248699%2413169603~xcm_pos~zPos3~xcm_srcCatID~z8699

[jhnvtjll]

A fan of the 49ers fan.

[jhnvtjll]

No wonder you're always at the ice cream shop.

[Stock_Barber]

Any 49ers fans?

[Stock_Barber]

Is it summer yet?

[MiamiGent]

Apparently no one needed a cap. Perhaps a new bathing suit for your wife?

https://www.cupshe.com/products/alina-v-neck-one-piece-swimsuit?variant=39824133554266&gclid=Cj0KCQjwpImTBhCmARIsAKr58cwnlruR23qvqf0zqvh6wfFlqJEe3SLG_MTurXA_ZmI-cfIrCUVlbmIaAt-LEALw_wcB

[Stock_Barber]

Happy Spring!

[MiamiGent]

She appears to be looking for her side piece. That could cause a wardrobe malfunction!

[jhnvtjll]

Did you say war related interference?

[MiamiGent]

It's possible you are experiencing war related interference.
Try getting in touch with this Musk fellow and ask if he'll position Starlink over Cleveland. You'll get a good connection... and maybe bombed.

[jhnvtjll]

LOL good one!

[jhnvtjll]

My GPS gave me directions to go south.

[MiamiGent]

CNBC

U.S. stock futures were slightly lower Monday morning as Wall Street looks to bounce back from a losing week. Dow futures implied an opening decline of roughly 160 points, while S&P 500 and Nasdaq futures also were in the red. (CNBC)

* 10-year Treasury yield tops 2.76% to start the week (CNBC)

The tech-focused Nasdaq Composite saw the biggest declines last week, falling nearly 3.9% as investors prepared for more aggressive policy tightening from the Federal Reserve. The S&P 500 slid 1.27%, ending a three-week winning streak, while the Dow Jones Industrial Average dropped 0.28%. The 30-stock Dow has now fallen two weeks in a row.

Oil prices fell by more than 4% on Monday, sending U.S. benchmark West Texas Intermediate crude futures below $94 per barrel. International benchmark Brent dropped about 4.1% to around $98.50 per barrel. (Reuters)

IN THE NEWS TODAY

Twitter shares fell Monday in premarket trading after CEO Parag Agrawal announced in a tweet Sunday night that Elon Musk is no longer joining the social network's board of directors. Agrawal did not say whether Musk offered specific reasons for opting against becoming a Twitter director. While Agrawal warned about "distractions ahead," the CEO said Twitter would "remain open" to Musk's input. (CNBC)

STOCKS TO WATCH

Nio (NIO) shares slumped 8.4% in premarket action after the China-based electric car maker suspended production due to Covid-19 related supply chain disruptions.
JetBlue (JBLU) is cutting back its summer schedule in an effort to avoid flight disruptions, while working to ramp up hiring. The New York-based airline added 1% in premarket trading.

Veru (VERU) shares surged 24.8% in the premarket after the drugmaker reported "overwhelming" evidence of efficacy for its experimental drug for treating hospitalized Covid-19 patients. It will meet with the Food and Drug Administration to seek emergency use authorization for the treatment.

Sailpoint Technologies (SAIL) shares soared 29.5% in premarket trading after the cybersecurity company agreed to be acquired by private-equity firm Thoma Bravo for $6.9 billion or $65.25 per share.

Shopify (SHOP) shares added 1.1% in the premarket after the e-commerce platform company proposed a 10-for-1 stock split, as well as the creation of a new "founder share" that would increase CEO Tobi Lutke's voting power to 40% from the current 34%.

AT&T (T) added 1.9% in the premarket after completing the spin-off of its WarnerMedia unit to Discovery Communications late Friday, with the stock of the newly combined Warner Brothers Discovery (WBD) set to begin trading today under its new name and ticker symbol. Separately, Deutsche Bank named Warner Brothers Discovery a "top pick" given its robust entertainment content.

Nvidia (NVDA) slid 3% in premarket action, following the announcement that the semiconductor firm would seek shareholder approval to double the number of authorized shares. That would give Nvidia the flexibility to take actions like stock splits and issuing equity incentives without a further shareholder vote.

Lowe's (LOW) fell 1% in the premarket after announcing the departure of David Denton as chief financial officer. Denton is leaving the home improvement retailer to take the same job at drugmaker Pfizer (PFE). He'll be replaced by Senior Vice President Brandon Sink effective April 30.


CONTRIBUTORS

Peter Schacknow
@peterschack

Kevin Stankiewicz
@kevin_stank

[MiamiGent]

lol

[Stock_Barber]

Hey, if she sent those to the IRS... I'd only get audited because the agent was looking for more pictures!

[Stock_Barber]

Does she come with the hat???

[MiamiGent]

You musn't be looking in the right area. From her cleavage, look north 'til you see a brim. That's the hat there.

[jhnvtjll]

Didn't know there's a hat in that photo.

[jhnvtjll]

The boxes are labeled "tax documents" to hide them from his wife.

Imagine this scenario.

(Wifey calls Barber at work)
Barber: Hello?
Wifey: Barber, we got audited
Barber: Well, go get the tax documents in the basement
Wifey: Ok, I'll get them and send to the IRS. Bye.
Barber: Bye.
(Barber then quickly realizes those boxes are actually filled with sorority girl pictures)
(Wifey calls Barber at work)
(Barber ignores call)
[to be continued]

[MiamiGent]

You fellas need a hat?

https://shop.whiskeyriff.com/products/haw-hee-camo-dad-cap?variant=20353963851874&utm_source=criteo&utm_medium=display

[MiamiGent]

My holds for Monday open. Hope to sell four pops. AMD, LMT, NVDA and ARCH.

Consider ARCH for the ramp to ER on the 28th??

[MiamiGent]

LOL... Well, Entertainment is 50% deductible! But ya have to remember to talk some business.
Filling out expense reports was a pain in the caboose when I worked for a big company, forty years ago

[Stock_Barber]

I wondered who was in my boxes!

[jhnvtjll]

Thanks. You too, MG! I still regularly trade these days. The only millions I'm counting is the millions of sorority girl pictures I found in Stock Barber's basement, in boxes labeled "tax documents".

Be careful when driving. Don't get distracted.

[MiamiGent]

She's fine!

---------

Yup, I got my palms this morning. Place them all over my truck. Protect me on the road.

8:00 Mass today. Driving to half asleep. Unwittingly blew a red light, I gather. Fortunately, the other guy was alert and braked.

Blessed palms and faith 138, accidents 0

Enjoy ur Sunday, jhn. What are you doing these days- counting your millions?

[jhnvtjll]

Happy Palm Sunday, MG!

[MiamiGent]

I am in Pennsylvania where thus far this year thirty one people have died at the pump. Regular gas in the state is on average $4.24 but in suburban Philly can run $4.65

Although the deaths are known to be from price shock, all are being recorded as Covid related, to increase hospital revenues. That makes perfect sense. That's the way we roll these days. Nothing is real. Things are just made up. Like this Atlantic "journalist", Anne Applebaum, who doesn't see any relevance whatsoever to Hunter Biden's laptop.

https://thepostmillennial.com/watch-the-atlantic-writer-calls-hunter-bidens-laptop-totally-irrelevant?msclkid=8ad81379b78911ec85268b8418747787

Although I am not a mod here, if there are any subsequent posts about wanting to shove chopsticks up her snot nose, I may have to refer the post to ihub when I return to Miami in eight weeks, if I can remember. I gave up drinking six months ago and now am having memory issues. Prolly should have left well enough alone.

Have a relaxing weekend, jhn, SB and all.

MG

[jhnvtjll]

Happy Spring Break!

[Stock_Barber]

Happy Spring!

[jhnvtjll]

And all are likely one-third of your age.

[jhnvtjll]

I won't show Mila's bad pic until the war is over. If SB is dying to see it, tell him to Google "mila kunis no makeup".

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/mila-kunis-nationality-ukraine-family-russia-b2035452.html

[MiamiGent]

Costco was $4.099 today. $60 and that was only 3/4 of a tank.
Biden could not get elected dog catcher today!
She fine, too.
Don't let jhn show you his favorite Mily horror pic. I know he's setting us up to be shown it. Just refuse to look. It can cause acid reflux.

[Stock_Barber]

LOL! I saw a gas station charging 30 cents less than everyone else... the line was around the block! And that was $4.09!

She wasn't there...

[MiamiGent]

Yup, she fine.

I hope you have ripped up and thrown away the unflattering pic. That would upset SB.

I just arrived back in So. FL following an 11 week, 5,300 mile sales trip. Saw a lot of nice natural scenery.
I don't usually like to brag about going to an expensive place but today I went to a gas station.

[Stock_Barber]

LOL! They are all very cute!

[jhnvtjll]

Happy Spring Break!

Stock Barber's favorite on the far right (the girl, not the politics).

[jhnvtjll]

Happy Monday!

MiamiGent's favorite Ukrainian.

[jhnvtjll]

That's ok. You haven't missed much. I haven't posted many pics.

[MiamiGent]

Wooops I just discovered today I accidentally had jhn on "ignore".
Don't be offended, Jhn- I accidentally put myself on ignore about once a year.
Sooo that's why I haven't heard from jhn in a good while!

My curser has to be grazing over the ignore button.
ihub needs to move that button when they do a format change.

MG
aka/LowTech

[jhnvtjll]

I was busy the past week with adoption papers.

[Stock_Barber]

That's a good half-effort, anyway!

[jhnvtjll]

Here's 6 but not zoomable.

[Stock_Barber]

Only 5? I was hoping for a 6-pack!

<Zoomable>

[jhnvtjll]

The worst is suffocating to death underneath a large group of hot sorority girls, and having the reason of death reported as covid.