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Wishing all my Kid's Safe Haven mod friends a very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! The tea leaves tell me 2010 will be a great year for all of us! It's time!
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all my old friends over here!
I have no idea who you could be talking about. LOL Get me a cold one also please!
hello all I have come to the conclusion that there are alot of stupid people in the world in which we live in.... lmao... I will have another beer please... KID
I had a rough day today is there anyone home so that I can have a drink or 10......lmao... kid
Kid, this is a good program for you and our Safe Haven Saloon friends who are 50 years old or getting close to that age. I highly recommend this program.
Subject: EXERCISE FOR PEOPLE OVER 50
Begin your routine by standing on a comfortable surface, where you have plenty of room at each side.
With a 5-lb potato sack in each hand, extend your arms straight out from your sides and hold them there as long as you can. Try to reach a full minute, and then relax.
Each day you'll find that you can hold this position for just a bit longer.
After a couple of weeks, move up to 10-lb potato sacks. Then try 50-lb potato sacks and eventually work up to where you can lift a 100-lb potato sack in each hand and hold it your arms straight for more than a full minute. (I'm currently at this level.)
After you feel confident at that level, put a potato in each of the sacks.
Enjoy!
RJ
I drink Blue light and clamato.... kid
Just waiting to un-cork the good stuff. Figs
been quiet around here lately..... we need to have a party to brighten up the saloon.....kid
animal talks...lol..Kid
----- Elephant asks the camel
An elephant asks a camel,
'Why are your breasts on your back?'
'Well,' says the camel,
'I think that is a strange question from somebody whose dick is on his face.'
LMAO! Good one Kid.
and the new Saloon Prayer...KID
Think before you speak...
Here are six reasons why you should think before you speak -
the last one is great!
Have you ever spoken and wished that you could
immediately take the words back...
or that you could crawl into a hole?
Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did....
FIRST TESTIMONY:
I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow
and asked loudly,
'How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?'
I turned around and walked back out and never went back
My husband didn't say a word...
he knew better.
SECOND TESTIMONY:
I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls.
I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using.
After browsing for several minutes,
I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store.
He asked if he could help me.
Without thinking, I looked at him and said, 'I think I like playing with men's balls'
THIRD TESTIMONY:
My sister and I were at the mall and
passed by a store that sold a
variety of candy and nuts.
As we were looking at the display case,
the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help.
I replied, 'No, I'm just looking at your nuts.'
My sister started to laugh hysterically.
The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away.
To this day,
my sister has never let me forget.
FOURTH TESTIMONY :
While in line at the bank one afternoon,
my toddler decided to release
some pent-up energy and ran amok.
I was finally able to grab hold of
her after receiving looks of disgust
and annoyance from other patrons.
I told her that if she did not start behaving
'right now' she would be punished.
To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening,
'If you don't let me go right now,
I will tell Grandma that I saw you
kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!'
The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange.
Even the tellers stopped what they were doing.
I mustered up the last of my dignity and
walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow.
The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me, were screams of laughter.
FIFTH TESTIMONY:
Have you ever asked your child a question too many times?
My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly.
One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch, in between errands
It was very busy, with a full dining room.
While enjoying my taco,
I smelled something funny,
so of course I checked
my seven-month-old daughter, she was clean.
The realized that Danny
had not asked to go potty in a while.
I asked him if he needed to go,
and he said 'No.'
I kept thinking 'Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and I don't have any clothes with me.'
Then I said,
'Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?'
'No,' he replied.
I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse.
Soooooo, I asked one more time, 'Danny did you have an accident? This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over, spread his cheeks
and yelled
'SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!'
While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing,
he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down.
An old couple made me feel better,
thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!
LAST BUT NOT LEAST TESTIMONY:
This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will,
in the future, likely think before she speaks.
What happens when you predict snow but don't get any!
We had a female news anchor that,
the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't,
turned to the weatherman and asked:
'So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?'
Not only did HE have to leave the set,
but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!
Now, didn't that feel good?
Pass it on to someone you know who needs a laugh
and remember
we all say things we don't really mean,
so think before you speak
and this is why we call Canada Gods country... KID
BLESSED CANADA
On the sixth day God turned to the Archangel Gabriel and said: 'Today I am going to create a land called Canada It will be a land of outstanding natural beauty. It shall have tall majestic mountains full of mountain goats, and eagles, beautiful sparkling lakes bountiful with bass and trout, forests full of elk and moose, high cliffs over-looking sandy beaches with an abundance of sea life, and rivers stocked with salmon.'
God continued, 'I shall make the land rich in resources so as to make the inhabitants prosper, I shall call these inhabitants Canadians, and they shall be known as the most friendly people on the earth.'
'But Lord,' asked Gabriel 'don't you think you are being too generous to these Canadians?'
'Not really,' replied God 'just wait and see the winters I am going to give them.'
AND NOW YOU KNOW.
hey Poster here is some great reading material for you hahah..KID
Nudist Colony
A man joined a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first day he took off his clothes and started to wander around the area. A gorgeous petite blonde walked by, and the man immediately got an erection.
The woman noticed his erection, came over to him and asked, 'did you call for me?'
The man replied, 'No, what do you mean?'
She said, 'You must be new here. Let me explain. It's a rule here that if you get an erection, it implies you called for me.' Smiling, she led him t the side of the swimming pool, laid down on a towel eagerly
pulled him to her and happily let him have his way with her.
Later, the man continued to explore the colony's facilities. He entered the sauna and as he sat down, he farted. Within seconds a huge, hairy man lumbered out of the steam room toward him.
'Did you call for me? ' asked the hairy man.
'No, what do you mean?' replied the newcomer.
'You must be new.' answered the hairy man, 'It's a rule that if you fart, it implies that you called for me.' The huge man easily spun him around, put him over a bench and had his way with the newcomer.
< SPAN style='FONT-FAMILY: Arial'>The newcomer staggered back to the colony office where he was greeted by a smiling, naked receptionist, 'May I help you?' she asked.
'Here's my membership card. You can have the key back and you can keep the $500 membership fee.'
'But, Sir,' she replied, 'you've only been here a few hours. You haven't had a chance to see all our facilities.'
'Listen lady, I'm 68 years old. I only get an erection once a month, but I fart 15 times a day. I'm outta here.'
Any open seat at the saloon tonight? I'll take a Long Island Tea to pass the time. Hope all are well.
Welcome to the Haven Saloon. This is a good place to get away from the riff raff and enjoy the company of some good folks.
I'll take 3 fingers JB Black...on the rocks! :)
welcome my friend, pull up a chair order a drink and enjoy some great conversation with some of the regulars, just be careful of CHUCKY the little SOB is off the wagon again so hang on to that drink tight...1st drink is on us after that you are on your on... have so fun and make some new friends.... KID
I wonder how the meeting went in Germany? It will be interesting to see what happens from here on out. Cheers, Figs
Every time I put him in rehab he escapes. Last time they found him liquored up and floating in the pool at the Holiday Inn! The bad part is you know what he likes to do when he is in a pool! LOL
hahahahah lmao well forget about the drink, the little SOB will drink everything in sight, I thought we discussed his rehab situation....lmao.. KID
That does sound good! Chucky is behind the bar so it might take a while! LOL
hahahahahah any blue light and clamato juice on tap... KID
That would be nice. I need a dollar to break even so it has a ways to go but I am holding till the fat lady sings. Figs
Figs, INIX hit .08 today and settled on .045 and they say that she is going to start going back up next week... maybe we are going to get our money back on this play.... kid
hi Gang. here is some great listening ads for all to watch... KID
http://www.veryfunnyads.com/
I did so...waiting for some dry powder, then I'm in.
Have you look over RCCH Venture?
HAHAHA Venture47 he needs to use some of that money to put out a PR for us...
Things are good FIGS!!! Our little baby is going to come out of hiding.
Just sitting here at the Haven Saloon waiting for my port to turn green. Hows things with you? Figs
Hey GUYS Just stopping in to see what is new!!
lol. So Al's down in sunny warm FL? lol.
and Gore calls this GLOBAL WARMING ... Kid
Sault Ste. MarieCurrent ConditionsMore info
Past 24 HoursRadar ImagerySatellite Imagery
-25 °C
Observed at: Sault Ste. Marie Airport
Date: 8:00 AM EST Thursday 28 February 2008
Condition: Sunny
Pressure: 102.4 kPa
Tendency: rising
Visibility: 24 km
Temperature: -24.5°C
Dewpoint: -28.1°C
Humidity: 72 %
Wind: calm
Forecast More info
Text ForecastAir QualityUV Forecast
Today
-10°C
-15°C
Details
Today
28 February
Day: Sunny with cloudy periods. High minus 10.
Night: Increasing cloudiness with 60 percent chance of flurries overnight. Low minus 15.
Issued: 5.30 AM EST Thursday 28 February 2008
Fri
-5°C
-12°C
Details
Friday
29 February
Snow. Amount 5 cm. High minus 5.
Issued: 5.30 AM EST Thursday 28 February 2008
Sat
-2°C
-20°C
Details
Saturday
01 March
Sunny. Low minus 20. High minus 2.
Issued: 5.30 AM EST Thursday 28 February 2008
Sun
0°C
-10°C
Details
Sunday
02 March
Snow. Low minus 10. High zero.
Issued: 5.30 AM EST Thursday 28 February 2008
Mon
1°C
1°C
Details
Monday
03 March
Periods of snow or rain. Low plus 1. High plus 1.
Issued: 5.30 AM EST Thursday 28 February 2008
Historical DataMore info
Record ValuesHistorical Weather
Yesterday
Max: -13.3°C
Min: -22.7°C
Precip: Trace
Normals
Max: -3°C
Min: -15°C Today
Sunrise: 7:20
Sunset: 18:20
hahahah well look who he trained under the Safe Haven Saloon Bar tender and part owner.. hahaha I rest my case... later my friend I am outa here and going to bed.. KID
The little guy is a drinker for sure. Have a good night my friend. Figs
Ya right and he will leave me alone all night, in a pigs eye, he will be pouring drinks faster than I can say NEXT.. lmao... kid
I will roll out the mattress and you can bunk with Chucky! HaHaHa
just finishing up watching a hockey game on the tube and then going to bed as the twins ran the pants off me tonight and my wife comes home from her business trip tomorrow so I have 5 days of cleaning to do in less then 18 hours... lmao... I may need to sleep at the bar tonight... KID
Whats up tonight my friend? I am trying to get caught up on some paperwork (taxes). Figs
hahahahahahaha I was just listening to the song again.. I laugh everytime I hear it...kid
Chucky just pissed his pants and fell off the bar stool! LOL
listen to this song... hahaha Kid
http://www.komando.com/videos/2-20.asp
hahahah read this... KID
A duck hunter was out enjoying a nice morning on the marsh when he decided to take a leak.
He walked over to a tree and propped up his gun. Just then a gust of wind blew, the gun fell over and discharged, shooting him in the genitals.
Several hours later, lying in a hospital bed, he was approached by his doctor who said, "I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that you are going to be OK. The damage was local to your groin, and we were able to remove all of the buckshot. The bad news is that there was some pretty extensive damage done to your penis. So I'm going to refer you to my brother."
"Well, I guess that isn't too bad," the man replied. "Is your brother a plastic surgeon?""Not exactly." answered the doctor. "He's a flute player in the local symphony. He'll show you where to put your fingers so you don't piss in your eye."
hahahah read this one... KID
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