Tornado Alley (PROG)

[arizona1]

And here you thought Arizona was nuts before. Dems release "extremist" list.

This is what you get when your legislature is controlled 2:1 by some of the most lamebrain excuses for thinking, caring public officials imaginable. And here you thought Arizona was Looneyville before. Just take a gander at the list of "38 extremist bills" that the Democratic Party has released. We're driving off a cliff, into a sewer of ALEC-sponsored dangerous stupidity.

It's a goddamn demolition derby of lunacy every day here. Governor Jan Brewer continues to hammer rivets of nonsense into the nation's psyche. Sunday on Meet the Press the finger-wavin' queen of absurdity endorsed Mitt Romney. I'm sure he's doing cartwheels -- being praised by an unpopular screech who'd stumble in a debate with Chatty Cathy. Then there's Senator Russell Pearce, the race-baiting author of SB 1070; he was recalled last November in a very conservative district, but was just elected #2 man in the Arizona Republican Party. That shows you how far right the GOP leadership is -- and what they think of the public. And there's always Arpaio, who was slapped down by the DOJ in January after a 3-year investigation uncovered countless incidences of racial profiling by his office. At the same time the DOJ story broke, another controversy erupted when media nationwide reported that the Sheriff had botched more than 400 sex crimes, some on children as young as two. This shameful story isn't over. Still, the 80-year-old flaccid fool is running for another term.

Oh, yeah, then there's Arizona's latest entry in the carnival of caca: Pinal County Sheriff Paul Babeu will likely be investigated for threatening to deport his Mexican boyfriend, at the same time he says he intends to stay in the CD4 primary race. Hahahahahahahaha!! Until last week Babeu led Republicans Paul Gosar, the current CD1 congressman, and Ron Gould, a rabid "family values" state senator (who has such strong values he doesn't mind passing out death sentences to patients waiting organ transplants).

We just learned that Sheriff Babeu has another problem: Channel 15 reported Sunday that, before moving to Arizona, Babeu was headmaster at a Massachusetts school that authorities judged to be abusive, and the place didn't have a license. "It was a cult," said one former student. Sheriff Babeu can wave goodbye to his congressional hopes. District 4 is perhaps the most conservative district in Arizona, and that's saying something. A homosexual sheriff who supports marriage equality and gays in the military, and whose former lover is undocumented, and who now stands accused by students and the state of running a "dangerous" and "sexually abusive" school, can kiss his candidacy adios, no matter how tough he is on Mexicans.

So, we've got our own local smorgasbord of high-octane nincompoopery, and in trots this nasty snotfest called the GOP presidential primary for last week's debate in Mesa. Wall-to-wall Rick Santorum for a week, saying stupid shit. Gawd, he turned the vile meter up to 11 last week in Arizona. The state will do that to crazies, who feel right at home in the Land of Goldwater (who'd upchuck if he had to spend an evening with today's Arizona delegation. Fucking Trent Franks -- Barry'd knee that theocratic psychopath in the nuts).

The GOP's full-steam-ahead attacks on women and the middle-class, as personified by the wackjob Trent Franks, are not working politically for these transvaginal pinheads as they dig deeper into crazyland, so you'd think they'd cool it. No friggin' way say the knuckle draggers at the Arizona legislature -- a tribe of Howdy Doody Marlboro Men who can't step outside their little room of reckless hate long enough to focus on jobs, healthcare, and education -- and civil rights. Double down on the nutso! They've gone on a holy tear, reaching beyond overreach.

To show just how disconnected the Republican majority in Arizona's legislature is from the issues that matter to residents, like economic development and education, last week the state Democrats released a list of 38 bills introduced by the GOP at the legislature this session. Talk about fiddling while Rome burns! Here's the list of "Tea Party's Extremist Bills of 2012" as distributed by the Dems (PDF), with their descriptions and the sponsor's name in parentheses. Blockquotes are mine.

Make-Arizona-its-own-country Bills

• HB 2650 (Burges) — The Birther Bill.

This POS requires presidential candidates to submit to the Arizona Secretary of State an "affidavit" verifying citizenship. An even tougher version passed the House and Senate last year (gulp!), but amazingly Jan Brewer vetoed it. She considered the bill too icky, because a certificate of circumcision could have been used to prove birth. So a new dick-free bill was introduced this session.

• HCR 2025 (Harper/Seel) — Calls on Congress to dissolve United States' membership in the United Nations

This Bircher holdover calls on the US to get out of the United Nations because, the bill says, "the only benefit to the United States of America of belonging to the United Nations is our country's veto authority on the Security Council." Right. For years there was a big billboard north of Tucson shouting "Get US out of the UN!" There's an active Arizona Bircher Society, which, Stephen Lemons says, is less radical than the legislature! Mormon fundy and former Senate President Russell Pearce literally studied at the feet of Bircher nutball Cleon Skousen, an LDS leader and McCarthyite who believed only white Mormon men can save the Republic. Any wonder where Pearce got the idea for SB 1070?

• HJR 2001 (Harper/Gould) — Calls for opposition to any UN force on American soil that seeks to enforce a UN treaty which has not been ratified by the United States Senate and authorizes the use of organized resistance to "thwart any international force" that attempts to do so.

Another grandstanding waste of time, this legislative turd says that because the UN "often uses international forces to impose its will on sovereign nations," if they do the same on Arizona soil they'll meet an "organized resistance." Maybe our new militia will come to the rescue! I sorta missed the last time the UN invaded the United States, but these lunatics probably have wet dreams about it, complete with helicopters and black-booted thugs. Think about it: grown men and women, elected officials, are sitting around discussing this conspiracy shit, and writing a goddam bill. Hack, hairball!

• HB 2437 (Gowan) — Prohibits states from implementing federal mandates unless the federal government provides proof of constitutionality

Got that? Before Arizona will follow federal regulations, the feds must prove to our nutball legislature that the policy is indeed constitutional. The feds must include "a report or document" testifying to the law's legality. This is clearly a swipe at the President's healthcare program, which faces court challenges and thus, in Arizona's beady eyes, does not yet possess the "report or document" the dipshits here demand.

• HCM 2002 (Barton) —Calls on the U.S. Congress for devolution of federally-owned public lands to Arizona

Yeah, this'll work. This bill is prefaced with lots of "whereases" that say Arizona has lost a ton of money because it hasn't been able to exploit every friggin' mountain, river, or canyon in the state. The truth is, because the feds care for about 30 percent of our land, Arizona receives far more money from Washington DC than taxpayers contribute. Sure, let's give Arizona's numbskulls all the federal land: national parks, national forests, national monuments, BLM territories, Indian reservations, military bases -- and no money to care for them. History repeats itself: when TR set aside the Grand Canyon in 1908, the politcos and businessmen here went crazy because the President had put an end to further exploitation of that big amazing hole. So let's take it back and drill, drill, drill! Don't think we wouldn't.

• HCM 2003 (Dial) — Calls on the U.S Congress to transfer all Bureau of Land Management lands to Arizona

Another shitload of unproven "whereases," such as Arizona being able to manage BLM property "better than bureaucrats in Washington DC." Bullpuckey, the BLM land managers are local, asshole; they're very much a part of their community. The state representative who sponsored HCM 2003, Jeff Dial, is a VP at Dial Chemical and a realtor on the side -- good training for land management! The GOP does not intend to "manage" the land, unless by "manage" you mean give it to the mining and timber industries, Big Ag, and anyone who wants to build a Wal-Mart.

Anti-Transparency/Voter-Suppression Bills

• HB 2441 (Gowan) —Makes "private" conversations with constituents exempt from public records requests

So if I, as Joe Senator, want to have a "private" conversation with the lobbyist from the private prison industry, I just call it that, and all of our communications (oral, written, electronic) are exempt from the public record and therefore cannot be petitioned by the press or public. How convenient.

• HCR 2039 (Seel) / SB 1449 (Smith) —Russell Pearce Sore-Loser Bill: Adds a primary round to a recall election for each party (in order to avoid a repeat of Republican v. Republican and resulting in, for example, Jerry Lewis' defeat of Russell Pearce last year)

Yep, the "sore loser" bill. We can't be having any more repeats of that Pearce thing, so let's rig the process to make recalls more complicated and more expensive, discouraging challengers and voters. In the meantime, Russell Pearce is running for the Arizona Senate again, so maybe the bill will be law in time to recall the old coot one more time, even with the added hurdles.

• HB 2710 (Tobin) — Calls for a special election for voters to choose between the district maps drawn by the Independent Redistricting Commission, committee approved by voters, or Republican Speaker Andy Tobin's own draft maps

Take a look at this legislation and consider the time that lawyers and lawmakers spent crafting the bill, which is going nowhere. There's a slew of bills here with Speaker of the House Andy Tobin's name attached to them. He and his GOP goons are furious at the Arizona Independent Redistricting Commission's final maps, because the Commission didn't bend over and spread wide enough for Republicans. The 5-member AIRC was approved by voters specifically to take redistricting out of the hands of incumbent legislators. The AIRC, whose members included two Ds, two Rs, and an Independent, held public meetings across the state and took into account the public's views, not incumbents', when crafting its maps. Governor Brewer ousted the chair and lone Independent, Colleen Mathis, after GOP congressmen like Ben Quayle whined to her about the new districts. The Arizona Supreme Court waved their own finger in Brewer's face and reinstated Mathis. So Speaker Tobin created his own maps, with no public input, which he wants voters to consider. Even Republicans say this is DOA.

• HCR 2052 (Tobin) — Calls for approval of new legislative districts drawn by Tobin, not the voter-approved Independent Redistricting Commission

The previous bill asks voters to consider a choice of district maps, either the AIRC's or Tobin's. If the Speaker's version is approved, this bill says the 2012 elections for state legislators will use his maps. Maybe someone should tell the dozens of legislative candidates who are already running in the AIRC's districts that things might change, just a few months before the election.

• HCR 2053 (Tobin) — Calls for approval of new Congressional districts drawn by Tobin, not the voter-approved Independent Redistricting Commission

Same for Congress, let's use Andy's maps, even though congressional candidates are already running in the AIRC's districts. No, this wouldn't mess things up, not at all.

• HR 2005 (Tobin) — Calls for a special election in which voters would determine whether to retain the voter-approved Independent Redistricting Commission maps or the Tobin-created maps

Evil twin to HB 2710 above. BTW, where the heck did Tobin get this "whereas": "Whereas, the voters of the state of Arizona have expressed the desire to vote to adopt alternative congressional and legislative districts." No, they haven't, Andy. You have.

• SCR 1035 (Biggs) — Repeals the voter-approved Independent Redistricting Commission

The heck with it, let's just get rid of the independent commission, the very agency voters demanded, because they're too, well, independent.

• HCR 2026 (Smith) — Instead of collecting petition signatures, a candidate can pay to be on the ballot.

Oh, this is juicy. The first thing candidates usually have to do is collect enough valid signatures to get their name on the ballot -- proving at least a modicum of support for one's candidacy. Under Senator Smith's plan, candidates who think it's a hassle to meet the public can just cough up some cash. The joker behind this bill, Steven Smith, also sponsored legislation that allowed Arizona to collect donations to build a border fence. His goal was $50 million, and he kicked off the enterprise last year with great fanfare. Since then the state has collected about $160,000 (they've taken the donation website down, so it's difficult to know). At this rate, only another 300+ years! Yeah, this is what they're working on.

• HCR 2044 (Stevens) — Legislative ballot initiatives would be voted on during primary elections with less voter turnout

Moves all citizen-initiated ballot propositions to the next primary election cycle, not the regular election, because the fewer people who vote the better!

• HCR 2043 (Stevens) — Requires all propositions with a positive fiscal impact on the city/state/county general fund that passed since 2002 to be re-voted on at the next general election and to be repealed automatically if they don't reach the two-thirds threshold

Any ballot proposition passed in the last ten years that affects the budget must be re-voted on, because we don't really believe voters meant to pass it. And in this post-Citizens United world, our corporate pals can spend gobs of cash to defeat it, which shouldn't be too difficult, since the bill also says propositions now require a two-thirds majority. You got that citizens? We don't trust your opinions and values, so we'd like to keep testing them, regularly, and raising the bar for what citizens want to three-fourths.

• HCR 2005 (Crandell) — Requires voters to re-approve initiative and referendum measures that involve public funds every six fiscal years and is retroactive to 1998

Man, they're petty SOBs. Again, any measure that citizens approved since 1998 must be voted on again by the electorate -- and re-approved every six years. Small government Republicans, indeed.

Miseducation Bills

• HB 2039 (Fillmore) — Normally, qualifying for a teacher’s certificate is required in order to teach; this bill would remove that requirement.

Hey, anyone can be a teacher! Only "snobs" demand a credentialed educator in front of the class. Maybe Senator Sylvia Allen can teach geology!
Yes, Senator Allen is on the Education Committee. Dumbest state? I rest my case.

• HB 2383 (Farnsworth) — Drops university requirements that students receive certain immunizations in order to attend classes and/or live in dorms there

The Michele Bachmann bill, because kids can get the crazy from vaccines.

• HB 2563 (Proud)— Bible Bill: Allows high schools to offer an elective on the Bible and exclude every other spiritual text from the book of Mormon to the Quran

The Bible is important enough to study. Others faiths not so much. At least it's an elective, but give them a year or two. You won't have to teach this course if you fail a religious faith test. Seriously. The bill's sponsor, Terri Proud, also introduced a bill supporting Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker. This is what they're spending their time on!

• HB 2675 (Kavanagh) — More debt for cash-strapped students bill: Requires a minimum $2,000 contribution by students toward their tuition, regardless of scholarships, grants or other financial aid that is need-based; students on athletic and academic scholarships are exempt from the contribution

Yeah, only students who can fork over $2,000 in cash upfront every year are worthy enough to attend college. Only Mitt Romney's friends and family need apply. What a great tool for advancing education in Arizona!

• HB 2719 (Seel) — Guns Near Campus Bill: Allows weapons to be carried immediately outside school grounds

Because that's what's wrong with our failing education system -- not enough guns near the school grounds.

• SB 1474 (Gould) — Guns on Campus Bill: Allows persons with CCW permits to bring guns onto college and university campuses

I have to learn to temper my classroom criticisms.

• SB 1061 (Crandall) — Allows schools to opt out of the National School Lunch Program, which provides some underprivileged students with their only meal of the day

The only good meal some students get in a day. Crass and cruel. Standard operating procedure for the GOP.

• SB 1467 (Klein) — Attacks the First Amendment, freedom of speech and local control by prohibiting profanity of any kind, even quoting a text, while teaching in the classroom. It would require suspension for the first two violations and termination for a third.

Crazy lady Lori Klein, the Senator who last year pointed her gun at a reporter, wants teachers to be subject to the language laws of the FCC. No cussing in class, and watch those wardrobe malfunctions! There's all kinds of legal limbo here, since the FCC makes exceptions based on context, so are they going to monitor the context in every classroom? Let's send our high school graduates to college without having read any modern literature.

• SB 1202 (Klein)—A strike-everything amendment [it had been a bill dealing with veterans' services] that would prevent teachers from speaking "partisan doctrine" in the classroom, even in government classes or speaking about political parties in a historical context, for example. A violation of this law would cause the Department of Education to withhold 10 percent of a school district’s monthly apportionment of state aid.

The Son of the Ethnic Studies bill, which did away with the Mexican American Studies program in Tucson, even though the community, teachers, and students supported it. So when you're teaching labor history, don't say or read anything positive about the Wobblies or you'll find your ass on the street.

Public Unsafety and Unhealthy Bills

• HB 2729 (Gowan) — Would allow a person to carry a deadly weapon into a public establishment or event, including where alcohol is present and/or sold. It removes the owner/sponsor's right to have the person remove the weapon and place it in temporary storage. It eliminates the liability exemption of owner/sponsor for damages/injuries/deaths resulting from use of a deadly weapon in a public event or establishment.

That's all we want: angry, drunk and now armed Lakers fans at a Suns game.

• SB 1083 (Allen) — Gives newly-created Arizona State Guard, a heavily-armed, untrained group of volunteers like the Minutemen, the powers to protect the border

Well hell, JT Ready and his merry band of White Supremacist vigilantes are already patrolling the border looking for Mexicans. Let's give them a badge, the authority to detain whoever they want, and even immunity from prosecution if they pull a wanker, like start an international incident. What could possibly go wrong?

Self-serving

• HB 2022 (Harper) — Repeals the one year moratorium on ex-legislators that prevents them from lobbying the legislature within that period

And guess what? This is Jack Harper's last term.

• HB 2078 (Harper) —Increases salaries of statewide elected executive officials

And guess what? Jack Harper intends to run for Secretary of State. His bill increases the SOS salary to $95,000 from its current $70,000.

• SB 1047 (Murphy, Yarbrough) — STO Expansion Bill: Establishes a tax credit for excess contributions to certified school tuition organizations and allows STOs to spend more money on administrative costs.

And guess what? You got it ... Senator Yarbrough directs a student tuition organization. Not shameless at all.

Attack on Middle-Class Families

• HB 2133 (Olson)—Takes money from kids' education and gives it to millionaires by allowing capital gains to be subtracted from income tax

But they're creating jobs!

• HB 2318 (Smith) / SB 1485 (Murphy)—Prevents agencies from recognizing, bargaining with, or meeting with union members and organizations

Arizona is already a right-to-work state, where unions are weakened, but at least they often set at the table. This bill does away with the table, outlawing any meetings between public agency managers and union representatives. Go away workers, we don't want to hear your ideas or concerns! That's our government's message to workers.

• HB 2040 (Fillmore)—School boards would not be allowed to meet with labor organizations or their members concerning employment contracts

That's right, school boards can't meet with the people who represent teachers. Another surefire way to improve education!

• HCR 2056 (Court)—Allows employers to lower pay by $3 under the minimum wage for workers under 20 years of age if employment is part-time or temporary, which would make it harder for students to pay the $2,000 minimum tuition contribution under Kavanagh's More Debt for Cash-Strapped Students Bill (HB 2675)

Jesus Fucking Christ! How pissy can these yahoos get? How low can they go? Isn't this the bill DeLay was pushing for the Marianas? Or is this another Gingrich janitor scheme? Get ready if it passes: More Arizona companies will hire people under 20 and put them to work part-time.

• HB 2519 (Fann) — Greatly diminishes the number of people who receive unemployment insurance by making it significantly harder to qualify

Among other things: take a drug test or forfeit your unemployment insurance eligibility. Aren't these legislators collecting public funds? Why not test them? Surely they're smoking something!

That isn't the entire list of mean-ass stupidity they've been working on by any means. Governor Brewer hopes to out-crazy Wisconsin's Governor Walker with her attacks on public sector workers, and we've been way ahead in the war on women, passing a forced ultrasound bill last year. At the same time all this fear-mongering, racism, homophobia, and outright nonsense have grabbed hold of the legislature, schools are suffering, healthcare is in the toilet, and Arizona has the nation's 15th highest unemployment rate, at 8.7%.

Just as the Arizona Republicans promised: they're focused like a laser on jobs.
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2012/02/28/1067127/-And-here-you-thought-Arizona-was-nuts-before-Dems-release-extremist-list-?via=siderec