Any Good Jokes?

[SHORENUFFSTUFF]

I went in to see my doctor yesterday and he said
"I haven't seen you in a long time." I said, "I know, I've been ill."

Just checked out my piles using a mirror.
Upon reflection, I guess I should have waited until the elevator was empty.

Exit signs? They're on the way out.

Humpty Dumpty died a crack head.

Veterinarian: "You're here to discuss your dog's salivation?"
"No. My dog's a good dog, he'll go to Heaven! I'm here about his slobbering."