Any Good Jokes?

[SHORENUFFSTUFF]

When my wife caught me using a penis enlargement cream, she laughed. I told her, "There's no need to rub it in."

I left my wife when she told me she was "really into Alan." It's been a tough week, what with that and being diagnosed as dyslexic.

"Out, damned spot ! Out, I say!"
( Lady Macbeth's dog takes a crap on the carpet.)

How many seconds are there in an hour?
About eight if you take my wife to a buffet.