Any Good Jokes?

[SHORENUFFSTUFF]

I hate helping my wife
do housework. Washing dishes, mopping the floor, doing the laundry, etc. Then six months later I have to do it all over again.

What's the difference between
a Rottweiler and a social worker? It's easier to get your kids back from a Rottweiler.

I used to sell furniture
for a living. The trouble was it was my own.

Went to an employment agency.
I said I would like a job where I can start at the top. They offered me a job digging graves.

Why prison may be better than work:

In prison, you get time off for good behavior. At work, you get rewarded for good behavior with more work.

In prison, you get three free meals a day. At work, you get a break for one meal and you have to pay for it.

In prison, you spend most of your time in an eight by ten cell. At work, you spend most of your time in an eight by eight cubicle.

In prison, you get your own toilet. At work, you have to share a toilet.

In prison, you spend most of your time looking through bars from the inside wanting to get out. At work, you spend most of your time wanting to get out and go inside bars.