Any Good Jokes?

[SHORENUFFSTUFF]

I accidentally took a woman's multi-vitamin this
morning. I have been trying to get dressed now for 2 hours but everything makes me look fat.


I believe for every drop of rain that falls,
a flower grows. And a foundation leaks and a ball game gets rained out and a car rusts and…

If a motorist cuts you off, just turn the other
cheek. Nothing gets the message across like a good mooning.

Keep your nose to the grindstone and your shoulder to the wheel…it’s cheaper than plastic surgery.

If you give someone some Beethoven CDs for a
gift and they don't like it, you can always take them Bach.

Our wifi is down and I had to fap using only my
imagination like some kind of savage.