Any Good Jokes?

[SHORENUFFSTUFF]

Safety first.
Just kidding, coffee first.
Safety's like third or fourth.

Guys with huge dongs are just
compensating for their tiny cars.

Listen, I'll play that funky music when you learn to ask me in a nice, non-derogatory way.

"R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to pee"
- Urethra Franklin

Blind snipers have no idea what they're missing.

Why don't prison inmates just use liquid soap?

It's not fair to blame Pizza Hut for my weight gain.
It was more of a Domino effect.

12 out of 12 bakers agree,
there should be one more baker in this study.

I've always wanted to be one of those people who
laughs all the way to the bank, instead of one who cries every time he leaves.

"Your voice is so sexy. How can I direct your call, babygirl?"
--Smooth Operator

The office supplier gave us some cheap toilet paper and now we've got a real mess on our hands.

I once had a goldfish that would hump the carpet
but only for about 30 seconds.

Old man ear hair is
an evolutionary survival trait based on 10's of thousands of years to drown out spousal bitching.