Any Good Jokes?

[SHORENUFFSTUFF]

Does the 5-second rule still apply in the
Men's bathroom at Target?
I'm pretty commited to this pretzel, if it matters.

I would not advise turning your frown upside down.
The surgery is extremely painful and not covered by most insurance.

If you honestly think I want to hear about the
details of your dream, then you're still f*cking dreaming.

I was told I needed to do some soul searching...
so I Googled James Brown.

Burger King's full name is
Burger Luther King Jr.

I'm saving myself for a girl without pepper spray.

Potatoes are high in carbs.
'Baked' potatoes are just high.

Life just handed me lemonade.
Not sure what to do.

I took everything with a grain of salt and now
I have hypertension