Clothes make the man. Indonesian children make the clothes.
Revenge is a dish best served with anchovies. Seriously, it hides the taste of cyanide.
Girls named Miranda never think it's funny when
you tell them they have the right to remain silent.
It's not called PowerRamble.
It's called PowerPoint, so please get to one.
About 50% of the time "good luck" means "f*ck you."
I'll never get a dog, but if I had to, I'd want
the kind that doesn't have its butthole displayed too prominently.
Dogs do their social networking on Assbook,
via the World Wide Whiff.
There's no I in you.
Yet.
I always go to the fattest kid at the concession
stand to buy popcorn at the movies because he knows how to butter it properly.
Physicists have yet to explain why 200 people
can be working at a Wal-Mart but only three registers will be open.
Walmart: because going to Target requires a shower.
Bob Dylan's singing sounds like me insisting I'm
okay to drive.
