Saturday, June 28, 2014 9:59:55 PM
Victoria Jackson Just Says Yes To Running For Office, All Wonkette’s Fever Nightmare Dreams Come True
by Doktor Zoom
11:57 am February 4, 2014
We knew it might happen [ http://wonkette.com/539224/victoria-jackson-considering-run-for-local-office-wonkette-offers-campaign-help ]. We hoped for the best. We had a campaign poster contest [ http://wonkette.com/539587/here-are-your-victoria-jackson-campaign-posters-you-liberal-commie-monsters ]. And now we have the candidate [ http://www.tennessean.com/article/20140203/WILLIAMSON01/302030069 ]. The Tennessean reports:
Former “Saturday Night Live” cast member Victoria Jackson wants her next act to be as a Williamson County Commissioner.
Jackson, who moved to Thompson’s Station last year, is petitioning as an independent to become a candidate for one of two District 2 commission seats, currently held by commissioners Betsy Hester and John Hancock.
V-Jack, honey, we are behind you 3000 percent. And in your world, that’s a real number.
Jackson says she’s running as an independent because she’s “very disappointed with the Republican Party,” presumably because it’s become so liberal lately, like Fox News. She told the Tennessean that she used to register as a Republican, but not anymore:
I just can’t do it anymore; they just don’t have the values of our founding fathers anymore,” she said. “I am sure there are a few Republicans who do. I want less federal government involvement, lower taxes, smaller government, more public involvement, a balanced budget and fiscal responsibility.”
Also, running as an independent allows her to bypass the May 6 Republican primary, but it would be really, really RUDE of us to suggest that had anything to do with her decision to run as an independent. As we know, Victoria Jackson is not one to shy away from a fight, especially if there’s the chance to say something stupid in public. We’ll be the first to admit that we just selfishly wish we could see her in a debate, is all.
In any case, she is totally sure she fits in with Middle Tennessee’s political culture:
“I think I will fit in quite easily with (the current county commission),” Jackson said. “I went to the dentist recently and there was a Bible in the lobby of the dentist office. … I love this town [Thompson's Station [ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thompson%27s_Station,_Tennessee ]]. My two favorite things are here — Jesus and show business.”
Wonkette was unaware that Jesus had purchased a residence in the town of about 2200, but we would be loath to question V-Jack’s wisdom on this. In addition to her keen Bible-spotting skills, Jackson shares many other qualities with her neighbors. Like many Tennesseans, she had a paranoid freakout over the opening of that mosque in Murfreesboro [ http://wonkette.com/540883/tennessee-genius-scott-desjarlais-religious-freedom-will-unleash-muslim-terror-zombie-mummies ], because America. She has also been reading up on the greatest threats faced by our once-great nation: the Muslim Brotherhood and its infiltration of the Obama administration, the UN’s freedom-destroying Agenda 21, and the Common Core education standards, all of which have direct bearing on the important work of a county commissioner. She even shared with the newspaper how she experienced a political awakening when she read the dictionary definitions of communism, socialism and capitalism:
“Then I said, ‘I smell a rat. I smell communism and socialism creeping in here and we’ve got to get rid of it,’” Jackson said.
But let’s not just take the Liberal Media’s word; let’s see what Jackson has to say on her very own blog [ http://victoriajackson.com/10501/yes-im-running-office-vote-jackson ]!
She opposes Common Core because it
1) dumbs down students 2) gathers a data base full of personal information on the parents which could be used against “political dissidents” 3) Common Core textbooks contain pro-socialist, pro-communist, pro-Islamic, and pro-racist propaganda, and sexually explicit and inappropriate content, i.e. how to masturbate
Good lord — you mean to say that the government keeps a database of people’s names and locations? JUST LIKE HITLER! Also, wanking instructions.
She also does not like the UN and its communist bike paths:
I’m against Agenda 21, which is being implemented already at the local level, in offices like Main St. Franklin where “Franklin Tomorrow” pushes “innocent” policies like bike paths and walking trails, perhaps unaware of the United Nations plot to separate American citizens from their private property, eliminate suburbs, and concentrate people groups into cities, forcing mass transit, eliminating cars under the false-science guise of “human caused” global warming/climate change.
Stop riding communist bikes! Get in your car and leave it running at all times, for Freedom.
Also, mosques are all “terrorist training camps” and there is no such thing as a “moderate Muslim.”
V-Jack promises that she will not run a conventional campaign, either:
“I don’t really want to beg for money from anybody; I hope to do it the old-fashioned way – word of mouth,” she said. “I may pay for some T-shirts and stickers with my own money. I have no political aspirations. I just want to help save my country. It should be about ideology, not about who has the most money.”
Ah, we see: She will coast on name recognition and hope for the best, then blame the liberal media and the liberal Republican establishment when she loses.
Well you just rest easy, V-Jack: You’ve got Wonkette in your corner, and with our unblemished record of support for Constitutional purists like Alvin Greene and BasilMarceaux.com [ http://www.republicaninarepublic.com/ ], you are guaranteed to get attention. Now get out there and get your nominating petitions going. Maybe ACORN can help.
©2014 Wonkette Media LLC (emphasis in original)
http://wonkette.com/541130/victoria-jackson-just-says-yes-to-running-for-office-all-wonkettes-fever-nightmare-dreams-comes-true [with comments]
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Victoria Jackson - We Should Have Voted on Slavery
Uploaded on Feb 17, 2012 by On Knees for Jesus [ http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCpHl0XeICT8X-mVzSkyM66Q , https://www.youtube.com/user/OnKneesforJesus4/videos ]
Ms. Jackson interviewed by Michelangelo Signorile at CPAC 2012.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/02/16/victoria-jackson-cpac-gay-marriage-obama-gop-_n_1281783.html
http://onkneesforjesus.blogspot.com/
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O2m_MBxfttQ [with comments]
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Victoria Jackson Campaign #1
Published on Jun 11, 2014 by Victoria Jackson [ http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIyWNzUgimu4yN2W06LDVfg , http://www.youtube.com/user/VictoriaJacksonShow/videos ]
Follow us:
http://www.VictoriaJackson.com
http://www.facebook.com/victoriajackson
http://twitter.com/vjacksonshow
Shop:
http://www.patriotdepot.com
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OEx1bB6WiTw [with comments]
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Victoria Jackson: The Blonde Jokes
Uploaded on Oct 15, 2007 by thoushaltlaugh2 [ https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbjfv7Uek7-LChdVLon1Gtw ]
From the DVD "Thou Shalt Laugh 2: The Deuce," Victoria Jackson tells some classic blonde jokes.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_eFuvNv5vsk [with comments]
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Serious Candidate Victoria ‘She’s Serious’ Jackson Will Save America From Obama’s Tyranny With Serious New Ad
[ http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2014/06/20/serious-minded-snl-alum-victoria-jackson-seeks-freedom-loving-voters-in-local-tn-election/ ]
by Doktor Zoom
1:15 pm June 20, 2014
Thank Loki and Coyote, our favorite political trickster hero, Victoria Jackson, has unleashed a spanking-new ad [ http://victoriajackson.com/11277/victoria-jackson-campaign-video-2-2 ] for her campaign to win election to a county commission in Tennessee. Her very own blog headline for this thing is “Victoria Jackson Campaign Video # 2,” and we couldn’t agree more with that assessment. Come, let us delight in its beautiful pointlessness.
The video starts with that cool list of government overreaches, absolutely none of which are within the purview of the Williamson County Commission:
• Common Core Marxist propaganda
• light bulbs — Big Gulps
• EPA
• Obamacare
• NDAA [ http://wonkette.com/458270/obama-wont-veto-law-that-turns-military-into-domestic-police-force ]*
• Internet Censorship
• Political Correctness
• CONTROLS MEDIA
OK, maybe, just maybe, the Williamson County Commission has some influence over the size of Big Gulps. And we suppose it could pass a regulation proclaiming “Kick A Muslim Day,” so maybe she could oppose political correctness by doing that. But the one issue that drives V-Jack more than any other, Common Core, which will force your children to stare at tiny cartoon genitals [ http://wonkette.com/542513/victoria-jackson-freaks-out-over-tiny-cartoony-genitals ] until they become sex-wild commie Muslims, is not addressed by the County Commission, not one whit.
And then we get to the talking part [ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-zVMupEtNo (next below, as embedded)]], which makes us yearn for the list.
This is actually pretty good, too, because V-Jack tells us she’s been chatting with “singer-songwriter Buddy Kalb” (who is “best known for hits such as “Mississippi Squirrel Revival,” performed by Ray Stevens, and “Frog Kissin’,” which was performed by numerous artists, including Chet Atkins,” according to the wiki [ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cyrus_%22Buddy%22_Kalb ]), with whom she has a very serious talk about how Barack Obama’s every move is governed by Saul Alinsky’s Rules for Radicals, which she points out is “dedicated to Lucifer,” but doesn’t note that it’s the character in Paradise Lost, not the actual Lord of Hellfire.
And then we get this very serious endorsement of Victoria Jackson’s campaign from Mr. Kalb, who is quite serious about her accomplishments:
“Well, I think you should vote for Victoria Jackson because she’s a very serious-minded person — unlike her persona, which is just an act. She takes things very seriously, she’s like a coin: on one side, she’s the very zany person you saw on Saturday Night Live; on the other side, she’s a very serious-minded person about this country, about politics, and the direction that we’re going. So, you should vote for her because she’s a very serious-minded person.”
And we’ll admit that there is one dude in here who we agree with — the guy who says we should vote for her because there are actually TWO Victoria Jacksons — “There’s the ditzy Victoria Jackson, and there’s the extremely ditzy Victoria Jackson!”
Best campaign ad since Mike Gravel threw a rock in a lake [ http://wonkette.com/268999/mike-gravel-will-kill-again ], people. Stop the communists, like Gov. Bill Haslam, the Republican that Jackson calls a “Progressive (Communist) who supports Common Core.” Vote V-Jack, before she runs for something where she could actually have an impact.
Also, here she is campaigning for another candidate, a guy running for state House. We like the ’76 Eldorado convertible, at least.
*at first we thought she was worried about NOAA, the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, because Global Warming is a hoax, but no, it’s the NDAA.
©2014 Wonkette Media LLC (emphasis in original)
http://wonkette.com/552308/serious-candidate-victoria-shes-serious-jackson-will-save-america-from-obamas-tyranny-with-serious-new-ad [with comments]
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by Doktor Zoom
11:57 am February 4, 2014
We knew it might happen [ http://wonkette.com/539224/victoria-jackson-considering-run-for-local-office-wonkette-offers-campaign-help ]. We hoped for the best. We had a campaign poster contest [ http://wonkette.com/539587/here-are-your-victoria-jackson-campaign-posters-you-liberal-commie-monsters ]. And now we have the candidate [ http://www.tennessean.com/article/20140203/WILLIAMSON01/302030069 ]. The Tennessean reports:
Former “Saturday Night Live” cast member Victoria Jackson wants her next act to be as a Williamson County Commissioner.
Jackson, who moved to Thompson’s Station last year, is petitioning as an independent to become a candidate for one of two District 2 commission seats, currently held by commissioners Betsy Hester and John Hancock.
V-Jack, honey, we are behind you 3000 percent. And in your world, that’s a real number.
Jackson says she’s running as an independent because she’s “very disappointed with the Republican Party,” presumably because it’s become so liberal lately, like Fox News. She told the Tennessean that she used to register as a Republican, but not anymore:
I just can’t do it anymore; they just don’t have the values of our founding fathers anymore,” she said. “I am sure there are a few Republicans who do. I want less federal government involvement, lower taxes, smaller government, more public involvement, a balanced budget and fiscal responsibility.”
Also, running as an independent allows her to bypass the May 6 Republican primary, but it would be really, really RUDE of us to suggest that had anything to do with her decision to run as an independent. As we know, Victoria Jackson is not one to shy away from a fight, especially if there’s the chance to say something stupid in public. We’ll be the first to admit that we just selfishly wish we could see her in a debate, is all.
In any case, she is totally sure she fits in with Middle Tennessee’s political culture:
“I think I will fit in quite easily with (the current county commission),” Jackson said. “I went to the dentist recently and there was a Bible in the lobby of the dentist office. … I love this town [Thompson's Station [ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thompson%27s_Station,_Tennessee ]]. My two favorite things are here — Jesus and show business.”
Wonkette was unaware that Jesus had purchased a residence in the town of about 2200, but we would be loath to question V-Jack’s wisdom on this. In addition to her keen Bible-spotting skills, Jackson shares many other qualities with her neighbors. Like many Tennesseans, she had a paranoid freakout over the opening of that mosque in Murfreesboro [ http://wonkette.com/540883/tennessee-genius-scott-desjarlais-religious-freedom-will-unleash-muslim-terror-zombie-mummies ], because America. She has also been reading up on the greatest threats faced by our once-great nation: the Muslim Brotherhood and its infiltration of the Obama administration, the UN’s freedom-destroying Agenda 21, and the Common Core education standards, all of which have direct bearing on the important work of a county commissioner. She even shared with the newspaper how she experienced a political awakening when she read the dictionary definitions of communism, socialism and capitalism:
“Then I said, ‘I smell a rat. I smell communism and socialism creeping in here and we’ve got to get rid of it,’” Jackson said.
But let’s not just take the Liberal Media’s word; let’s see what Jackson has to say on her very own blog [ http://victoriajackson.com/10501/yes-im-running-office-vote-jackson ]!
She opposes Common Core because it
1) dumbs down students 2) gathers a data base full of personal information on the parents which could be used against “political dissidents” 3) Common Core textbooks contain pro-socialist, pro-communist, pro-Islamic, and pro-racist propaganda, and sexually explicit and inappropriate content, i.e. how to masturbate
Good lord — you mean to say that the government keeps a database of people’s names and locations? JUST LIKE HITLER! Also, wanking instructions.
She also does not like the UN and its communist bike paths:
I’m against Agenda 21, which is being implemented already at the local level, in offices like Main St. Franklin where “Franklin Tomorrow” pushes “innocent” policies like bike paths and walking trails, perhaps unaware of the United Nations plot to separate American citizens from their private property, eliminate suburbs, and concentrate people groups into cities, forcing mass transit, eliminating cars under the false-science guise of “human caused” global warming/climate change.
Stop riding communist bikes! Get in your car and leave it running at all times, for Freedom.
Also, mosques are all “terrorist training camps” and there is no such thing as a “moderate Muslim.”
V-Jack promises that she will not run a conventional campaign, either:
“I don’t really want to beg for money from anybody; I hope to do it the old-fashioned way – word of mouth,” she said. “I may pay for some T-shirts and stickers with my own money. I have no political aspirations. I just want to help save my country. It should be about ideology, not about who has the most money.”
Ah, we see: She will coast on name recognition and hope for the best, then blame the liberal media and the liberal Republican establishment when she loses.
Well you just rest easy, V-Jack: You’ve got Wonkette in your corner, and with our unblemished record of support for Constitutional purists like Alvin Greene and BasilMarceaux.com [ http://www.republicaninarepublic.com/ ], you are guaranteed to get attention. Now get out there and get your nominating petitions going. Maybe ACORN can help.
©2014 Wonkette Media LLC (emphasis in original)
http://wonkette.com/541130/victoria-jackson-just-says-yes-to-running-for-office-all-wonkettes-fever-nightmare-dreams-comes-true [with comments]
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Victoria Jackson - We Should Have Voted on Slavery
Uploaded on Feb 17, 2012 by On Knees for Jesus [ http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCpHl0XeICT8X-mVzSkyM66Q , https://www.youtube.com/user/OnKneesforJesus4/videos ]
Ms. Jackson interviewed by Michelangelo Signorile at CPAC 2012.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/02/16/victoria-jackson-cpac-gay-marriage-obama-gop-_n_1281783.html
http://onkneesforjesus.blogspot.com/
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O2m_MBxfttQ [with comments]
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Victoria Jackson Campaign #1
Published on Jun 11, 2014 by Victoria Jackson [ http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIyWNzUgimu4yN2W06LDVfg , http://www.youtube.com/user/VictoriaJacksonShow/videos ]
Follow us:
http://www.VictoriaJackson.com
http://www.facebook.com/victoriajackson
http://twitter.com/vjacksonshow
Shop:
http://www.patriotdepot.com
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OEx1bB6WiTw [with comments]
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Victoria Jackson: The Blonde Jokes
Uploaded on Oct 15, 2007 by thoushaltlaugh2 [ https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbjfv7Uek7-LChdVLon1Gtw ]
From the DVD "Thou Shalt Laugh 2: The Deuce," Victoria Jackson tells some classic blonde jokes.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_eFuvNv5vsk [with comments]
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Serious Candidate Victoria ‘She’s Serious’ Jackson Will Save America From Obama’s Tyranny With Serious New Ad
[ http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2014/06/20/serious-minded-snl-alum-victoria-jackson-seeks-freedom-loving-voters-in-local-tn-election/ ]
by Doktor Zoom
1:15 pm June 20, 2014
Thank Loki and Coyote, our favorite political trickster hero, Victoria Jackson, has unleashed a spanking-new ad [ http://victoriajackson.com/11277/victoria-jackson-campaign-video-2-2 ] for her campaign to win election to a county commission in Tennessee. Her very own blog headline for this thing is “Victoria Jackson Campaign Video # 2,” and we couldn’t agree more with that assessment. Come, let us delight in its beautiful pointlessness.
The video starts with that cool list of government overreaches, absolutely none of which are within the purview of the Williamson County Commission:
• Common Core Marxist propaganda
• light bulbs — Big Gulps
• EPA
• Obamacare
• NDAA [ http://wonkette.com/458270/obama-wont-veto-law-that-turns-military-into-domestic-police-force ]*
• Internet Censorship
• Political Correctness
• CONTROLS MEDIA
OK, maybe, just maybe, the Williamson County Commission has some influence over the size of Big Gulps. And we suppose it could pass a regulation proclaiming “Kick A Muslim Day,” so maybe she could oppose political correctness by doing that. But the one issue that drives V-Jack more than any other, Common Core, which will force your children to stare at tiny cartoon genitals [ http://wonkette.com/542513/victoria-jackson-freaks-out-over-tiny-cartoony-genitals ] until they become sex-wild commie Muslims, is not addressed by the County Commission, not one whit.
And then we get to the talking part [ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-zVMupEtNo (next below, as embedded)]], which makes us yearn for the list.
This is actually pretty good, too, because V-Jack tells us she’s been chatting with “singer-songwriter Buddy Kalb” (who is “best known for hits such as “Mississippi Squirrel Revival,” performed by Ray Stevens, and “Frog Kissin’,” which was performed by numerous artists, including Chet Atkins,” according to the wiki [ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cyrus_%22Buddy%22_Kalb ]), with whom she has a very serious talk about how Barack Obama’s every move is governed by Saul Alinsky’s Rules for Radicals, which she points out is “dedicated to Lucifer,” but doesn’t note that it’s the character in Paradise Lost, not the actual Lord of Hellfire.
And then we get this very serious endorsement of Victoria Jackson’s campaign from Mr. Kalb, who is quite serious about her accomplishments:
“Well, I think you should vote for Victoria Jackson because she’s a very serious-minded person — unlike her persona, which is just an act. She takes things very seriously, she’s like a coin: on one side, she’s the very zany person you saw on Saturday Night Live; on the other side, she’s a very serious-minded person about this country, about politics, and the direction that we’re going. So, you should vote for her because she’s a very serious-minded person.”
And we’ll admit that there is one dude in here who we agree with — the guy who says we should vote for her because there are actually TWO Victoria Jacksons — “There’s the ditzy Victoria Jackson, and there’s the extremely ditzy Victoria Jackson!”
Best campaign ad since Mike Gravel threw a rock in a lake [ http://wonkette.com/268999/mike-gravel-will-kill-again ], people. Stop the communists, like Gov. Bill Haslam, the Republican that Jackson calls a “Progressive (Communist) who supports Common Core.” Vote V-Jack, before she runs for something where she could actually have an impact.
Also, here she is campaigning for another candidate, a guy running for state House. We like the ’76 Eldorado convertible, at least.
*at first we thought she was worried about NOAA, the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, because Global Warming is a hoax, but no, it’s the NDAA.
©2014 Wonkette Media LLC (emphasis in original)
http://wonkette.com/552308/serious-candidate-victoria-shes-serious-jackson-will-save-america-from-obamas-tyranny-with-serious-new-ad [with comments]
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Greensburg, KS - 5/4/07
"Eternal vigilance is the price of Liberty."
from John Philpot Curran, Speech
upon the Right of Election, 1790
F6
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