Howie Carr: Weekend at Biden’s becomes Joe Biden’s European Vacation
Dementia Joe Biden is on his grand tour of Europe, so this edition of the wit ‘n’ wisdom of the 46th president will not be called Weekend at Biden’s.
Instead, it’s Joe Biden’s European Vacation.
When President Biden arrived in the United Kingdom, he spoke at a military base, which is one of his great pleasures. All dialogue guaranteed verbatim:
“There’s nothing that Jill and I and Joe enjoy more than spending time with our troops and their families wherever we go in the world.”
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Last year he once introduced himself as Jill Biden. Now Biden apparently thinks of himself as two different people — “Joe and I.”
He saluted the British military, especially the “R.F.A.” He reiterated that America wants to avoid “confrict” with Russia. (At least this time he didn’t call the Russian president “Clutin.”)
Of course Biden saluted his hosts: “I’d like to point out that the greet from the British government has been exemplary.”
Since his mental decline, he has always been clueless with numbers — this week he bragged about providing a “half a billion” free vaccines, then cut the number to “half a million,” before finally reverting back to the original “half billion doses that we’ll be sending around the world to be produced in the United States.”
Sleepy Joe exhorted Americans to get their shots at the assorted “vaxin’ sites,” including your local “Y.M.C.” He changed the name of the disease yet again. What he sometimes calls “COVID 9” this week became “Globid COVID 19.”
In Britain, he introduced a titan of Big Pharma:
“Now I’d like to turn it over to my friend, the CEO and chairman of Pfizer, Avril Al Albert Bourla,” more commonly known as simply Albert Bourla.
How is the Panic going overall, though, Mr. President?
“To sum it up, look: COVID cases are down. COVID deaths are up.”
Once again, Biden forgot how long he’s been president.
“Since January 20, and we’re talking now about 15 months ago, the average daily cases are down from 184,000 to 19,000.”
The man is a real wizard with figures, no doubt about it.
“The first 14 months, first time first time in 14 months we saw the largest decline in the number of long-term unemployed more in more than a decade in the last 10 years.”
By the way, Biden said he was quoting government statistics.
“This report is based on a weekly uh uh in a week in early May that’s how we they determine the uh the job growth or loss we have growth.”
As time goes on, Biden is more and more flummoxed by the letter “L.” Again this week he referred to the “American Rescue Pan.” Now, though, in addition to dropping “L,” he randomly adds the letter to words. He called for more so-called investments in climate change “to prevent the worst implacts” of climate change.
Then there was his trip to Tulsa to commemorate the 100th anniversary of the Tulsa race massacre, which he said happened “a century aglow.”
In Tulsa he recalled meeting an elderly woman — “when she saw the insurrection on Jan. 9 it broke her heart.”
Yes, Mr. President, but what about the other “insurrection,” you know, the one on Jan. 6?
Biden bemoaned the fact that after 100 years, the survivors in Tulsa haven’t had “cloture.” Not closure, cloture.
Somehow, Dementia Joe can never quite pull off a proper pander to the Black community. In Tulsa he lamely tried to compliment Black entrepreneurs but said they often can’t succeed because “they don’t have lawyers, they don’t have accountants.”
Which probably came as a surprise to billionaires Robert Johnson, Oprah Winfrey and Byron Allen, among others.
If you listen to Biden, the world is beset by endless problems, the direst of which depends on the audience he’s incoherently babbling to that day.
Occasionally it’s Russia, more often the virus. But Biden’s default threat to human survival is climate change, which he variously describes as an “existential” or “sexesential” challenge.
In Tulsa, though, he quoted the “intelligence community” (i.e., corrupt Democrat hacks like John Brennan, James Comey, James Clapper, Peter Strzok, et al.) to the effect that “terrorism from white supremacy is the most lethal threat to the homeland today.”
However, that threat evaporated overnight after a British newspaper reported, based on emails from Hunter Biden’s laptop, that his beloved crack-addled alcoholic younger son routinely used the “n-word” in his correspondence with one of his lawyers.
White supremacy? Never mind. Nothing to see here folks, move along …
By Friday, climate change was back to top of Dementia Joe’s sexestential, er existential crises.
“Because there’ll be significant population movements, fights over land, millions of people leaving places because they are literally sinking below the sea in Indonesia.”
Below the sea! Into the earth’s molten core! May we quote you on that, Mr. President?
A few more of Joe’s recent Greatest Hits:
“Everyone needs to get their shots, though. Now’s the time to accelebrate the process we’ve been making.”
“We can’t reboot the world’s largest economy like flipping on an ice light switch.”
“Stimulus checks: They drastically reluced reduced depression according to the study.”
“They came from back lines like my family, working-class, middle-class families.”
“I keep forgettin’ I’m president.”
If only the rest of us could, Mr. President.
Tags: Howie CarrJoe Biden
