The Passion of the Urbie

[texasholdem]

OT Now you are making sense. See there is another side of the coin. The old happy Chisox.

[chisox pat]

Doc, thanks so much for posting those here. I hope there are more to come and I love the additional commentary at the top. Thanks.

[drwatson]

Nevada was an isolated outpost of religious and corporate freedom in the early 21st century, and HFUC was not the only charismatic to seek refuge there.

The only contemporary reference to Saint Alejandro is as the patron saint of “big ass watches,” scholars disagree as to why HFUC would invoke his name.

[drwatson]

Patron of the arts, humanitarian, and revolutionary…HFUC was all these, and more, to those who had the faith.

[drwatson]

HFUC never met a moral dilemma he couldn’t solve! (The face on the t-shirt is believed to be singer Tom Jones.)

[drwatson]

HFUC gave and gave and gave. Even regulators have been unable to fully reconstruct the extent of his generosity.

[drwatson]

Some scholars believe that “OCS” was a financial intermediary of some sort, but no trace of it exists today. The model car on the table is the diecast 1/24 scale Jim Dunn Racing Pontiac Firebird.

[drwatson]

This HFUC AH includes a reference to the old show tune, (“Moadmaker, moadmaker, make me a moad!”). HFUC was a well-known patron of the arts.

[drwatson]

Most copies of this sacrilegious image have been destroyed by HFUC faithful, he was known to be incapable of playing any type of computer or video game, both as a matter of principle and because of his poor hand-eye coordination.

[drwatson]

Hector is a shadowy figure in the history of HFUC, but one theory is that he originally sold or gave HFUC the American Shaft.

[drwatson]

Of particular interest here is the tape recorder on the table, the versatile yet affordable Sanyo TRC-580M Microcassette Tape Recorder. Often referred to as “the Judas picture” by scholars, this is unusual amongst HFUC AH iconography in that it explicitly represents HFUC’s associates as being prepared to betray him to the forces of evil.

[drwatson]

Another tribute to the massive humanity of HFUC, as he reminds us once again that he is not blessed with the trait of perfectionism. If only we could all aspire to such imperfection!

[drwatson]

More computer naiveté from HFUC. (The phrase “new office” is believed to be a reference to an unrelated church in close proximity to HFUC’s main center of worship, Madame Dana’s Temple of the Divine Release.)

[drwatson]

Scholars have long argued over the meaning of “the company with the same initials” but it now accepted that this refers to “United Carina,” which was either a mining scam or a Bolivian soccer team.

[drwatson]

One of HFUC’s many adorable traits was his lack of computer proficiency, here depicted as he falls victim to one of the best social engineering tricks, the “I love you” virus. Many HFUC devotees find it comforting that He needs love, just like the rest of us.

[drwatson]

Perhaps of interest to etymologists only: although the spelling “revolke” is now part of standard American English, back in the time when CMKX was still trading, the accepted spelling was “revoke,” and “revolk” was a misspelling common amongst the less educated of the HFUC devotees. Of course, the use of the “revolk” spelling in the official canonization of Saint Urban had a lot to do with the decision by the OED to change the proper spelling.

[drwatson]

The post I am responding to is the earliest known representation of Holy Father Urban Casavant At Home (known to the faithful as HFUC AH). Like all great art, this original speaks to us all, across the ages, with its simplicity and timeless truth. And like many great icons, there have been subsequent imitations of the original, many versions of HFUC AH, with varying degrees of success.

Let’s review some of them here. If you find one of these, or something that looks like one, in your attic, please take it to your local authorized Casavant Diamonds retailer to have it professionally valued. Some of these beauties have very high valuations, sometimes even parallel valuations in the trillions of dollars! (Authorized Casavant Diamonds retailers are the only ones qualified to value these artifacts, and are prepared to offer very large quantities of CMKX stock in exchange for your HFUC AH images.)

Here’s an early HFUC AH. Note the mixed case text – like the better comics, most HFUC AH’s are all upper case – and a reference to GLUV Corp’s mangled series of splits and reverse splits, a brief and now-forgotten knee-slapping footnote in financial history.

[chisox pat]

(to Superstition – By Stevie Wonder)

Ve-ry suspicious, writing’s on the wall,
Ve-ry suspicious, that it’s about to fall,
Thirteen months since running, cannot trace the cash
Almost a trillion printed, hope is in the past.

When you plead the fifth, when you’re put on the stand,
You’re gonna suffer,
Revocation’s on the way

Ve-ry suspicious, what happened to “The Plan”?,
Bad luck was the problem, they’re doing all they can,
Keep me in a daydream, keep me goin’ strong,
Frizzy’s gonna save us, someone pass the bong.

When you plead the fifth, when you’re put on the stand,
You’re gonna suffer,
Revocation any day, yeh, yeh.

Ve-ry suspicious, what more can I say,
Ve-ry suspicious, the SEC’s been paid,
Thirteen months since running, cannot trace the cash
Almost a trillion printed, hope is in the past.

When you plead the fifth, when you’re put on the stand,
You’re gonna suffer,
Revocation’s on the way, ya, ya, ya

[chisox pat]

Indeed. Been catching up on all the interesting events of the last few weeks. I see Frizzel has made about $100,000 for filing a couple of motions. Nice work if you can get it.

[occams_razor]

It's addictive, ain't it?

[chisox pat]

Had to see how this turns out.

[occams_razor]

lol, welcome back!

[chisox pat]

We can never know about the days to come
But we think about them anyway
And I wonder if you really bought the lies
Or are just pumping it for pay.

Deregistration, Deregistration
Is making me late
Is keeping me waiting

And I tell you how easy it is to see the red flags
And the house and the hummers for Urbie.
Though the company pretends to fight
No filings on EDGAR will not please the SEC.

Deregistration, Deregistration
Is making me late
Is keeping me waiting

And come Tuesday we might not be together
I'm no prophet, I don't know Judge’s ways
I'll hope some of you have seen the light now
And from here on won’t get sucked in on these plays.

Deregistration, Deregistration
Is making me late
Is keeping me waiting

[fung_derf]

That's a faux grub!

[fung_derf]

Even better, find the sheet music on the internet and cut and paste it so we can all follow along.

[occams_razor]

nice grub!

[Susie924]

Thanks Pat!

A little birdie told me it was available!

[chisox pat]

Nice grub Susie

[Burpzilla]

It's the old Mad Magazine thing, it helps. Thx

[chisox pat]

That was to "I will Always Love You" by Whitney Houston. I always figure people will get it, ot they won't and putting the name of the original won't help, but I'll give it a try.

[Susie924]

Evening Burp!

Oh my...did I find a grub?

[Burpzilla]

Can you put "sung to the tune of" at the bottom of those... I can't figure that particular tune out. Thanks in advance.

[chisox pat]

Mr Long: 'Ello, I wish to register a complaint.

(The pumper-clown does not respond.)

Mr Long: 'Ello, Miss?

Pumper-clown: What do you mean "miss"?

Mr Long: I'm sorry, I have a cold. I wish to make a complaint!

Pumper-clown: We're closin' for lunch.

Mr Long: Never mind that, my lad. I wish to complain about this stock what I purchased not half an year ago based on your recomedation.

Pumper-clown: Oh yes, the, uh, the CMKX...What's,uh...What's wrong with it?

Mr Long: I'll tell you what's wrong with it, my lad. It's dead, that's what's wrong with it!

Pumper-clown: No, no, It's uh,...It's resting.

Mr Long: Look, matey, I know a dead stock-play when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.

Pumper-clown: No no it's not dead, it's, it's restin'! Remarkable stock, the CMKX, idn'it, ay? Remarkable acreage!

Mr Long: The acreage don't enter into it. It's stone dead.

Pumper-clown: Nononono, no, no! It's resting!

Mr Long: All right then, if it's restin', I'll wake it up! (shouting at the screen) 'Ello, Mister Naked Short Victim! I've got a lovely fresh settlement for you if you show...

(pumper-clown ups the bid)

Pumper-clown: There, it moved!

Mr Long: No, it didn't, that was you spoofing the bid!

Pumper-clown: I never!!

Mr Long: Yes, you did!

Pumper-clown: I never, never did anything...

Mr Long: (yelling and bidding the ask repeatedly) 'ELLO URBIE!!!!! Testing! Testing! Testing! Testing! This is your nine o'clock alarm call!

Mr Long: Now that's what I call a dead stock-play.

Pumper-clown: No, no.....No, 'it's stunned!

Mr Long: STUNNED?!?

Pumper-clown: Yeah! You stunned it, just as it was wakin' up! Mineral pplays stun easily, major.

Mr Long: Um...now look...now look, mate, I've definitely 'ad enough of this. That stock-play is definitely deceased, and when I purchased it not 'alf an year ago, you assured me that its total lack of movement was due to it bein' tired and shagged out following a prolonged run.

Pumper-clown: Well, it's...it's, ah...probably pining for the fjords.

Mr Long: PININ' for the FJORDS?!?!?!? What kind of talk is that?, look, why did it fall flat on its back the moment I got it home?

Pumper-clown: The CMKX prefers keepin' a low bid! Remarkable stock, id'nit, squire? Lovely acreage!


Mr Long: Look, I took the liberty of examining this stock when I got it home, and I discovered the only reason that it had been sitting on the ask in the first place was that it had been PUMPED there.

(pause)

Pumper-clown: Well, o'course it was pumped there! If I hadn't pumped that stock up, it would have nuzzled up to those bars, bent 'em apart with its beak, and VOOM! Feeweeweewee! To Da Moon!!!!!!!!

Mr Long: "VOOM"?!? Mate, this stock wouldn't "voom" if you put four million volts through it! 'It's bleedin' demised!

Pumper-clown: No no! 'It's pining!

Mr Long: it's not pinin'! 'It's passed on! This stock-play is no more! It has ceased to be! It's expired and lost it's market makers! It's a stiff! Bereft of life, it rests in peace! If you hadn't fooled a thousand longs 'it'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'It's off the twig! 'it's kicked the bucket, 'it's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!! THIS IS AN EX-STOCK-PLAY!!

(pause)

Pumper-clown: Well, I'd better replace it, then. (he takes a quick peek behind the counter) Sorry squire, I've had a look 'round the back of the shop, and uh, we're right out of mining plays.

Mr Long: I see. I see, I get the picture.

Pumper-clown: I got a slug.

(pause)

Mr Long: Pray, does it talk?

Pumper-clown: Nnnnot really.

Mr Long: WELL IT'S HARDLY A BLOODY REPLACEMENT, IS IT?!!???!!?

Pumper-clown: N-no, I guess not. (gets ashamed, looks at his feet)

Mr Long: Well.

(pause)

Pumper-clown: (quietly) D'you.... d'you want to come back to my place?

Mr Long: (looks around) Yeah, all right, sure.

[chisox pat]

My cash I will play,
Bashers cannot make me sway.
I won't go, cause I know
I was right on this stock play.

And I am sold on Maheu.
I am sold on Maheu.
You, my darling Maheu. Hmm.

Free worthless divvies
at least I'm taking with me.
No goodbye. I won't cry.
We both know I sold long ago.

And I am sold on Maheu.
I am sold on Maheu.

(Instrumental solo)

I hope life treats you kind
And I hope you have all you've dreamed of.
And I wish to Urbie, joy and happiness.
If you drop the soap, remember the glove.

And I am sold on Maheu.
I am sold on Maheu.
I am sold on Maheu.
I, I am sold on Maheu.


You, Urbie, I love you.
Ooh, I'll always, I'll always love you.

[chisox pat]

His name is Urbie, he sold the U-hauls
With the stock painted on racecars, it's headed straight on up to Mars
He loved to gamble, hitting the slots
And while he tried to be a star, ol' Ed D ran it from afar
And in their office suite, they worked from noon till 3
They were well paid and had some lemmings
Who could ask for more?
At the Races (GO!), Ultimatescamma (Ultimatescamma)
The sweetest deal north of Nirvana (here)
At the Races (GO!), Ultimatescamma
Racing and promotion were always the notion
At the Races....they sucked 'em in
(Races Ultimatescamma)

His name was Mach-o, he had a stock board
He wanted a basher free zone, because he couldn't hold his own
When it was finished, he gave it over
But Mach-o went a bit too far, and Bob Z fried his derriar
And then the insults flew and then IHUB was torn in two
There was fear in a handful of dust
But some were blind that they had lost


At the Races (GO!), Ultimatescamma (Ultimatescamma)
The sweetest deal north of Nirvana (here)
At the Races (GO!), Ultimatescamma
Racing and promotion were always the notion
At the Races....she lost her ass
(Races. . Ultimatescamma)
(Races Ultimatescamma) (Ultimatescamma, ahh ahh ahh ahh)
(Ahh ahh ahh ahh Races Ultimatescamma)
(Talking Nirvana have a free bandana)
(Racing and promotion were always the not-ion)

His name is Mahue, he fronted Hughes
But that was 30 years ago, since then he hasn't has much use
Now he's a has-been, but not to the sheep
He's still Mission Impossible guy, shorties surely now will fry
Minimum they'll be fined, a fraction of what they robbed you blind
He took your cash but drew the SEC
I think he'll be confined.
At the Races (CO!), Ultimatescamma (Ultimatescamma)
The sweetest deal north of Nirvana (here)
At the Races (CO!), Ultimatescamma
Racing and promotion were always the notion
At the Races....don't fall in love
(Races) don't fall in love
Ultimatescamma
Ultimatescamma
etc. to end

[chisox pat]

Sorry for the repost, had to change a line....

On a warm summer’s evenin’ on a train bound for nowhere,
I met up with the pumper; we were both too tired to sleep.
So we took turns a starin’ out the window at the darkness
’til boredom overtook us, and he began to speak.

He said, son, I’ve made a life out of stealing people's savings,
And getting them to buy more by the way I theorize.
So if you don’t mind my sayin’, I have seen you at the races.
For a taste of your whiskey I’ll give you some advice.

So I handed him my bottle and he drank down my last swallow.
Then he bummed a cigarette and asked me for a light.
And the night got deathly quiet, and his face lost all expression.
Said, if you’re gonna play the game, boy, ya gotta learn to play it right.

You got to know when to pump ’em, know when to dump ’em,
Know when to walk away and know when to run.
You never count your money when you’re dishing out the fable.
There’ll be time enough for countin’ when you sell into the run.

Now ev’ry pumper knows that the secret to decevin’
Is to divert the mark's attention from promises we don't keep.
’cause ev’ry stock's a winner and ev’ry stock's a loser,
And the best that you can hope for is to dump them on some sheep.

So when he’d finished speakin’, he turned back towards the window,
Crushed out his cigarette and faded off to sleep.
And somewhere in the darkness the pumper, he was scheming.
But in his final words I found an ace that I could keep.

You got to know when to pump ’em, know when to dump ’em,
Know when to walk away and know when to run.
You never count your money when you’re dishing out the fable.
There’ll be time enough for countin’ when you sell into the run.

You got to know when to pump ’em, know when to dump ’em,
Know when to walk away and know when to run.
You never count your money when you’re dishing out the fable.
There’ll be time enough for countin’ when you sell into the run.

[chisox pat]

Everybody's buyin' a can't miss stock, now
(Come on baby, do the Stock-promotion)
Come and listen to me while I feed you a crock, now
(Come on baby, do the Stock-promotion)
The billboard can be seen on racing on the TV;
And disregard the action by the SEC
So come on, come on, do the Stock-promotion with me.
You gotta pass on the tip, now. Come on, baby.
Pump up. Attack. Well, now, I think you've got the knack.
Now that you can do it, let's bring some more in.
(Come on baby, do the Stock-promotion)
Preferably the wealthy, with more money to pour in.
(Come on baby, do the Stock-promotion)
Do it nice and easy, now, don't lose control:
Average down and dump more money in the hole.
So come on, come on, do the Stock-promotion with me.
Everyone wants more in a Stock-promotion.
(Come on baby, do the Stock-promotion)
Be sure to tell your friends if you get the notion.
(Come on baby, do the Stock-promotion)
There's never been a stock like this, now way we can lose.
Here's a good post by Sterling you might want to peruse,
So come on, come on, do the Stock-promotion with me.

[Churak]

Thanks, Kenny...lol...very good...this board needs to be revived

[chisox pat]

On a warm summer’s evenin’ on a train bound for nowhere,
I met up with the pumper; we were both too tired to sleep.
So we took turns a starin’ out the window at the darkness
’til boredom overtook us, and he began to speak.

He said, son, I’ve made a life out of stealing people's savings,
And getting them to buy more by the way I theorize.
So if you don’t mind my sayin’, I can see you’re out of aces.
For a taste of your whiskey I’ll give you some advice.

So I handed him my bottle and he drank down my last swallow.
Then he bummed a cigarette and asked me for a light.
And the night got deathly quiet, and his face lost all expression.
Said, if you’re gonna play the game, boy, ya gotta learn to play it right.

You got to know when to pump ’em, know when to dump ’em,
Know when to walk away and know when to run.
You never count your money when you’re dishing out the fable.
There’ll be time enough for countin’ when you sell into the run.

Now ev’ry pumper knows that the secret to decevin’
Is to divert the mark's attention from promises we don't keep.
’cause ev’ry stock's a winner and ev’ry stock's a loser,
And the best that you can hope for is to dump them on some sheep.

So when he’d finished speakin’, he turned back towards the window,
Crushed out his cigarette and faded off to sleep.
And somewhere in the darkness the pumper, he was scheming.
But in his final words I found an ace that I could keep.

You got to know when to pump ’em, know when to dump ’em,
Know when to walk away and know when to run.
You never count your money when you’re dishing out the fable.
There’ll be time enough for countin’ when you sell into the run.

You got to know when to pump ’em, know when to dump ’em,
Know when to walk away and know when to run.
You never count your money when you’re dishing out the fable.
There’ll be time enough for countin’ when you sell into the run.

[janice shell]

Excellent!!

[chisox pat]

Who's the ruler of this scene
Wolfing down those Krispy Kremes?
MATT!
Ya damn right!

Who loves all the pumper clowns
And those whose heads are in the ground?
MATT!
Can you dig it?

Who's the cat who wusses out
When pumpers throw their weight about?
MATT!
Right On!

They say this cat Matt is a bad mother
SHUT YOUR MOUTH!
I'm talkin' 'bout Matt.
THEN WE CAN DIG IT!

He's a complicated man
No one tells him what to do except for Mach's clan
Matt Brown!

[janice shell]

LOLOL!!

[99Dan]

Attention CMKX shareholders…

Everything is hearsay until we get a PR

We don’t know the full story yet

I still think anyone holding this stock is in for a pleasant surprise

Don't worry we are not out of the ball game yet

We all know that the SEC can't see past their nose and are slow to react

Don't panic, it is only temporary and looks like it will be GOOD not BAD

Actually it is Good when trading is suspended to check out HUGE valuation

Roger performed his duty in spectacular fashion just like he always does

It's going to take ten days to check out all the fist sized Diamonds

I think the stock was starting a nice rise but it was being manipulated to keep it down that could be what the suspension is all about

I'm sure Roger knew all about the suspension and was well prepared for it. I believe this is a deal worked out in the back room and is no surprise to anybody in the know

Yours truly
Bagdad Bob

[chisox pat]

HE IS IRON BOB….

Has he lost his mind?
Can he see or is he blind?
Can he walk at all,
Or if he moves will he fall?
Is he alive or dead?
Has he thoughts within his head?
Can’t believe he’s still out there
Let’s give him the position of Co-Chair

He captured our imagination
with the botched assassination
Bagman for the Feds and Hughes
DeBeers is now singing the blues

Everyone wants him
He chose us, don’t you see
Finding us diamonds
He will make history

Now the time is here
for Iron Bob to spread fear
Vengeance octogenarian style
I can’t wait until we file

Everyone knows him
Shorties quaking with fear
He’ll right the ship, yea
Just give us one more year

Filings coming soon
Hedge funds feel impending doom
Covering as fast as they can
Iron Bob lives again!

[chisox pat]

Reportedly by "Countrygent" on Stockhouse

CKKM Diamunds Thanks New Janitor For Cleaning Up Company
Thursday February 17, 6:29 pm ET
LAS VEGAS--(BUSINESS WIRE)--Feb. 17, 2005--CKKM Diamunds Inc. (Pink Sheets: C-CUP) today announced it has completed a major initiative to spruce up its Las Vegas business offices.

On Feb. 9, 2005, CKKM engaged Juan Ramirez, a janitor formerly employed by the Las Vegas Municipal Bus Company specializing in hard-to-remove spills and stains, as chief custodian and cleaner to guide CKKM through its health and sanitation requirements. "When I joined the board one of my first comments to Urbane was, 'What the heck is that sour smell in this boardroom?'. A lot more goes on in here than alot of people might guess from reading our press releases, and there were coffee cups, cigarette butts, old Dominos boxes and take-out bags all over the place, and what looked suspiciously like bloodstains in a few places on the carpet. These guys had just lost sight of the fact this is one of the world's leading diamund exploration companies, not a motorcycle gang clubhouse. My old chum Howie Hughes wouldn't have come within a mile of what had become a minor toxic dump site. A prime component of my plan to reinstate CKKM to its proper glory was to get the offices looking a little nicer than a run-down Motel 6 Lobby, which difficult task was efficiently and expeditiously handled by Mr. Ramirez," stated Robert A. Machoo, co-chairman of CKKM.

"On behalf of the company and its stockholders, we would like to sincerely thank Juan, and his wife, who did a few loads of laundry for me as well," puffed Urbane Casavaplant, CEO/president of CKKM.

With its ofices now lemony fresh and sparkling clean, CKKM can now file current, quarterly and annual reports with the SEC disclosing vital corporate information to the investing public and its stockholders without fear such filings may be a viable mode of transmission of highly virulent strains of strep or staff virus. However, due to the length of time CKKM has not been properly cleaned there are a substantial number of garbage bags and empties yet to be picked up by the good men and women of the Greater Las Vegas County Sanitation Department. Readers of this press release are encouraged to drive by any evening after 8:00 pm Las Vegas time when Juan is usually vacuuming the front hallway, and wave through the front windows.

"We are extremely appreciative of the confidence with which we can now sit down in the executive washroom. I have sat in there in the past and well, it reminded me of my days before the revolution in Cuba, and those aren't exactly happy memories of enjoying a little quiet time in the can at the Four Seasons, if you get my drift" said Machoo.

CKKM is currently working toward completing a restocking of the office fridge. "The Coffee Mate says best before July '05, and I suppose we could use it, but we don't want to take a chance at this point in our ceaseless exertions on behalf of our super-loyal shareholders" said Mr. Casavaplant. "I was into the Pepto Bismol bigtime last week, and I had to let a few biggies fly at the Executive Committee meeting. We had to crank open a few windows because Bob started coughing real bad. Sure, it might have been the salad bar at the Alladin, but I really wonder about that Coffee Mate. It was left out over the weekend a few weeks back, and I think Bob may have forgotten to put the lid back on. He is getting a little forgetful. So we talked it over and found room in the development budget for some of that Coffee De-lite, which a few of the boys say is pretty good, if you get the French Vanilla." Investors and stockholders are being asked to please refrain from contacting Juan to allow him to focus on completing the task at hand, and pop down to the Qwicky Mart for coffee supplies.

Funny-Looking Statements

This press release may contain statements that constitute "funny-looking statements" as defined under U.S. federal securities laws describing this, that and other things we are supposed to report now and again.

Generally the words "believe," "expect," "intend," "estimate," "anticipate," "establish," "project" and similar expressions are not understood in exactly the same way by everyone, leading to misunderstandings sometimes described as hysterical in nature. Funny-looking statements are based on current expectorations and assumptions that are subject to certain crazy things and other matters we don't want to discuss at this time that could cause your actual financial standing to differ materially from your wishful projections. Such funny-looking statements are inherently amusing to us, and actual results may differ in the most curious ways imaginable from those expressed or implied in the funny-looking statements. Consequently, readers are cautioned not to place undue reliance on anything you read in these funny-looking statements, which upon closer examination may seem slightly irrelevant as of the date they are made.

CKKM's actual results could differ materially from such funny-looking statements because of factors such as: reality; unforeseen lack of whatever might be required; the effectiveness of CKKM's personal grooming and office sanitation initiatives; and other risks associated with waking up each day. CKKM undertakes no obligation to publicly update or revise any funny-looking statements to reflect reality or the potential necessity to close up shop and high-tail it out of town to foreign jurisdictions where the rum is cheap and the women are friendly.


Contact:
CKKM Diamunds Inc.
Joey Fonzarelli, 306-123-3355
[e-mail]


Source: CKKM Diamunds Inc.

[occams_razor]

very good!

[chisox pat]

Strange Thing Mystifying

LONG

It seems to me a strange thing, mystifying
That a broad like you can waste her time on bashing of this kind.

SUBLIME

Hey, cool it man.

JANICE

Why can't you understand that this amuses,
But to let them fleece you, take your cash, not smart, time after time.
It's not that I object to speculation,
But the facts don't fit in well with what the PRs say.
It doesn't help them if they're inconsistent.
They SEC only needs a small excuse to put them all away.

LONG

Who are you to criticise this?
Who are you to despise this?
Leave us, leave us, let us be now.
Leave us, leave us, with our theories now.
If you own this stock, then you can throw stones.
If you are not long, then leave us alone.

JANICE

I'm amazed that men like you can be so shallow, thick and slow
There is not a chance in hell that the O/S is remotely low.

ALL

No, you're wrong!
You're very wrong!
No, you're wrong!
You're smoking bongs!
No, you're wrong!
Can't fool us longs!
No, you're wrong!
We're holding strong!
How can you say that?
How can you say that?
How can you say that?
How can you say that?

JANICE
Not one, not one of you!

[chisox pat]

What's the Buzz?

LONGS

What's the buzz?
Tell me what's a-happening.

MELVIN

Why should you want to know?
Don't you mind about the future?
Don't you try to think ahead?
Save the riches for tomorrow;
Listen to me sing instead.

LONGS

What's the buzz?
Tell me what's happening.

MELVIN

I could give you facts and figures.
Even give you plans and forecasts.
Even tell you where we're drilling.

LONGS

When do we cash in on the IUM?

MELVIN

Why should you want to know?
Why are you obsessed with knowing
Times and dates that won't come true?
If you knew the path we're riding,
I'd be beaten black and blue.

LONGS

What's the buzz?
Tell me what's happening.

STERLING

Let me try to pump up the crowd a bit.

URBAN

Sterling, oooh, that is good,
While you prattle through your theories,
Reasons why we're a cash cow.
You alone have tried to give me
What I need right here and now.

LONGS

What's the buzz?
Tell me what's happening.

[chisox pat]

Now that the Easter season is upon us it is time for the much anticiapted basher rock opera "Roger Glenn Esquire". After the instrumental overture.........

Diamonds on Their Minds

MELVIN

My mind is clearer now.
At last all too well
I can see where we all soon will be.
If you strip away
the myth from the land,
You will see where we all soon will be.
Urban! We've started to believe
The things they say of you.
We really do believe
This talk of God is true.
And all the good you've done
Will soon get swept away.
They're starting now to question
All the things you say.
Listen Urbie I don't like what I see.
All I ask is that you listen to me.
And remember, I've been your right hand man all along.
You have set them all on fire.
They think we've formed a new Empire.
And they'll hurt you when they find they're wrong.
I remember when this whole thing began.
Running the presses, according to plan.
And believe me, my admiration for you hasn't died.
But every word you say today
Get's twisted 'round some other way.
And they'll hurt you if they think you've lied.
Canada, your famous son should have stayed a great unknown
In the Orleans playing slots He'd have made lots.
Tables, slots, and sportsbook bets would have suited Urban best.
He'd have caused nobody harm; no one alarm.
Listen, Urbie, do you still want to race?
Don't you see we must keep in our place?
We are basherized; have you forgotten how put down we are?
I am frightened by the SEC.
For they are way smarter then we.
And they'll crush us if we go too far.
Listen, Urbie, to this warning before...........
Please remember that I want to dump more.
But it's sad to see our chances weakening with every hour.
Not all your followers are blind.
No more diamonds on their minds.
It was beautiful, but now it's sour.
Yes it's all gone sour.
Listen, Urbie, to the warning I give.
Please remember that I want us to live.
He won't listen to me ...

[chisox pat]

From Zen,

http://www.investorshub.com/boards/read_msg.asp?message_id=5212457

TOTALLY COOL

After all the rampant speculation about the whos and whys of our new website, check out these badazz dudes designing our new site!!

http://home.earthlink.net/~nivekretrac4/portfolio.html

Skulls of death, aneurysm records, scumdogs and sloppy seconds are just a few of their big hits. Clearly they're a great fit for a company planning on making a proper sec filing and impressing Wall Street and the mining community. LOL Hey, at least they haven't done porn sites (not that I can tell at least). Ahhhhh, now we're back in rhythm -- inexplicable, baffling choices by CMKX management. Why turn to a true professional design firm that caters to corporate clients in the financial community when you could have SKULL DESIGNS and anarchy on your site. Hard to follow how we can chose a lawyer of Roger's caliber but hand off IR duties to Hot Air Melvin, website design to some skateboarders, and give away a Hyundai at a fleabag Vegas hotel to celebrate. LOL Hopefully our accountants of choice are more towards Roger than our other lovely choices. God only knows who will sit on our Board of Directors. Tony Hawk? Tommy Lee? SpongeBob? LOL Yeeeeehaw. It's good to be back where we started!! Let's see how many brilliant posters deduce that this was intentional to throw off the shorters and keep them guessing what our next move is. LOL Oh the humanity!!!
P.S. I just loved this little humdinger on Black Sheep Design's site: "We design web sites for those who have a limited amount of capital."
Z
As always, these are my personal opinions.
Hopefully nobody in here is investing anything but "fun" money that they can afford to gamble with.