I too lost all my money twice as well. Luckily this was when I was young and just starting out. As a last resort I took money out of my house to start over and vowed never to be in that state again. I realized that the main reason why I lost all of my money twice was due to holding onto losers and averaging down to zero. Everyone's errors are different but you need to notice them and not repeat the same mistakes. And I never play more than what I can afford to lose 100% in 1 position. So even when I break discipline and hold onto garbage positions, it will not wipe me out like it did when I started out. You NEVER want 1 strikeout to end your career. Like baseball, this is 9 innings, 9 outs per inning, 3 strikes per out . You don't want to strike out on 1 swing and end your career!
When looking at other huge traders who bank huge, they also lose huge. The key mentally for me was to realize this is NOT gambling. It's a job. The last red day I had was over 3 months ago and for a tiny amount (knock on wood). Daytrading is definitely NOT gambling if you are disciplined. That's why I feel trading is more of a mental game than anything else. It's a daily struggle to be in control of your own emotions in the constant swings.
And that's why I take so many vacations! You need to have a clear mind when you trade else you will do stupid things and blow up. This year I went to vegas 5 times, went to Hawaii 2 times, went to Japan and Korea, all over California, New York, and will traveling more whenever I find time. But sometime you just have to MAKE TIME. The markets will always be there...