***Fish Hooks...
...Eugene Steinman, a recent high school graduate from North Dakota, moved to Florida and went into an "everything under one roof' department store that displayed a sign “Salespeople wanted.”
..The Manager said, "Tell me Eugene, do you have any sales experience?"
..Eugene said, "Yes Sir. I sold Rainbow vacuum systems door to door during my junior and senior years in high school back in Bismarck, North Dakota. I sold quite a few too; I was one of Rainbow's best salesmen even though I was part time.”
..The boss said, “Well you’re a likable guy--neatly dressed, clean cut, and polite. You’re our kind of guy. You are our newest salesman. Our starting pay is half of minimum wage plus two percent of the sales you make.
..You’ll start tomorrow at 10:00 a.m. When you arrive see Joyce for instructions. She’ll help you learn the ropes and show you around. I'll come down after we close and see how you did and answer any questions you might have.”
..Eugene’s first day on the job was rough. It seemed like he walked from one end of the huge store to the other over twenty times. After closing, the boss came down to the sales floor. "Well Eugene, how many customers bought something from you today?"
..Eugene frowned and without eye contact answered, "One."
..The boss said, "Just one?! Our sales people average sales to 20 to 30 customers a day. That will have to change, and soon, if you'd like to continue your employment here.
..We have very strict standards for our sales force. One sale a day might have been acceptable in North Dakota, but you're not on the farm anymore, son."
..The kid took his tongue lashing while looking at his shoes. The boss felt bad for chewing him out on his first day. He asked, "So, how much was your one sale for?"
..Eugene took a copy of the sales receipt out of his pocket and glanced at it. He looked at the Manager and said, “Before tax, the customer’s purchases totaled three hundred and forty seven thousand, one hundred and thirty seven dollars, and sixty five cents.”
..The astonished boss said, “What did you sell him?"
..Eugene said, "Well, first, I sold him three boxes of various size fish hooks. Then I sold him some live bait and a new fishing rod to go with his new hooks. Then I sold him a dozen lures in case he'd run out of live bait.
..Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down the coast. I told him he was going to need his own boat cause boat rentals there are hard to find at this time of year.
..He agreed, so we went down to the boat department and I sold him a twin-engine, 27-ft Boston Whaler, and an aluminum trailer. He realized his Honda Civic wouldn’t be able to pull the boat, so I took him down to the automotive department and sold him a 4x4 Ford Expedition."
..The boss said "A customer came in here to buy fish hooks and you sold him a boat, a trailer, and a truck?"
.....Eugene said, "Well not exactly Sir. The guy came in here to buy tampons for his girlfriend. While I was walking him over to the feminine hygiene aisle I said, 'Dude, your weekend's shot, you might as well go fishing.' "
