A Pirate walks into a bar... sporting a paper towel.
Bartender says "Sir, what's with the paper towel hat?"
"Arrrrrgggg.. Thar be a bounty on me head"
Another pirate walks into a bar...
This one has a ship's wheel tied to the front of his breeches.
Bartender asks, "Hey buddy. What's up with the wheel?"
"Arrrrrgggg... It's drivin' me nuts!"
"911 what's your emergency"
Hi-- huh? Um-- so, uh-- ah. Oh geez! Well I’m only just now realizing that the girl at the bar gave me a fake number.
A man was walking one day, when he came to this
big house in a nice neighborhood. Suddenly he realized there was a couple making love out on the lawn. Then he noticed another couple over behind a tree. Then another couple behind some bushes by the house. He walked up to the door of the house, and knocked. A well dressed woman answered the door, and the man asked what kind of a place this was. This is a brothel, replied the madam.
“Well, what’s all this out on the lawn?” queried the man.
“Oh, we’re having a yard sale today.”
